oc26 in idea barrages

1.) Joe Buck pronounces the title of the new Harry Potter movie like he is about to puke saying it.

2.) Sometimes you lose faith. Sometimes you say “there is no way reality-competition shows could get any stupider”. Then you see an ad for THE MASKED SINGER and you realize, stupid is bottomless, there is always dumber to go.

3.) Get hired to go give a talk at the candlefactory as a votivational speaker.

4.) Be the coal in the canary mine.

5.) Cities rose & fell as did the seas, the only constant being that there were people. They all had different language & technologies but their lives were always short & brutish & they all deserved amelioration to their suffering & all deserved more time to dream than they received.

6.) This nightmare was about being at a spring-break-style wild party that started off fun and over the course of days, just got lonely and exhausting. I just wanted someone to actually talk to, somewhere to lay my head and rest.

7.) The best way to deal with crazy “Benghazi” conspiracy theorists is to act like B’ngssi was one of the Elder Gods in Lovecraft.

8.) Step 1: decorate some basketball socks to look like the London Underground subway. Step 2: Call them “Tube socks”. Step 3: ??? Step 4: Profit.

9.) A conspiracy of fat men is a Voluminati.