oc22 in idea barrages

1.) A cartoon about Elmer Fudd trying to hunt deer called “Buck Fuddies”.

2.) Your all-woman metal band will be called Aimee Mannthrax.

3.) I am forever surprised when the British manage to pronounce “Zebra” as if it rhymes with “Deborah”.

4.) The first rule of Write Club is to consider your bias and privilege. The second rule of Write Club is to CONSIDER YOUR BIAS AND PRIVILEGE.

5.) All dogs hate costumes but some love their people enough to put up with them.

6.) Sometimes it’s fun to remember that HEY DUDE wasn’t a shared mass hallucination by my generation but an actual thing that happened, was aired and people were paid to make it.

7.) Sometimes I think about how when I first heard of Pokemon, I thought it was going to be, like, a Jamaican thing.

8.) The most proof I have that there is a knowing order to the universe is that when they made an Incredible Hulk film, it turned out that they didn’t like him when he was Ang Lee.

9.) The Adidas logo except about Abobo from Double Dragon, somehow.

10.) I love how sometimes ovens begin measuring temperature numerically but end with an abstract concept. 400. 425. 450. BROIL. Everything after 450 is the abstract concept of broiling.

11.) We are, like, two days away from “IF THERE’S GLOBAL WARMING, HOW ARE THERE STILL COOL RANCH DORITOS?” being considered cogent political discourse on the evening news.

12.) When Noah started yelling up and down about a flood, most people though he was just being delugeional.

13.) When you live a life as easy and as seamless as Richie Rich’s was, your punishment is the ever-shamed and endless death of being Casper.

14.) Every rejection letter hurts a little bit less but only very very little less. What I need is like 20 years more of regular reps.

15.) I wonder how often I have been flirted with and I thought the woman was just being nice and I realize, now, that “a lot” and “almost never” are equally sad answers in radically different ways.

16.) A Beatles parody about old school Dungeons & Dragons and its obsession with maximum carrying weight.

17.) Everything that doesn’t make sense in politics can be explained by Stockholm Syndrome.

18.) Fan fiction where the scientist from Beekman’s World is the black sheep of the Beekman family that’s always selling goat soap on QVC and he is estranged for loving science more than selling lotion on basic cable.