n16 in idea barrages

  • Nov. 16, 2017, 4:21 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

1.) The day after Thanksgiving, don’t shop, just eat leftovers and read old MAD magazines and call it “Blech Friday”.

2.) Treadmill tonight: 1.2 miles in a half hour. Evening blood sugar: 88. (Thank you for putting up with my health updates, by the way, friends. I find doing this helps keep me accountable to myself.)

3.) The 90s make a lot more sense if your head-canon involves, as mine does, the main guys in Oasis being Gallagher’s British bastard children.

4.) There is no term for the kind of religious cranks coming out to say that it was fine Roy Moore was assaulting teenage girls other than The Y’alliban.

5.) If a group of diaper fetishists go out drinking, is that a crawl pub crawl? A pub crawl crawl?

6.) In the evil mirror universe ALLY MACBEAL was called ENEMY MACBEAL and, yes, she had a meticulously styled goatee.

7.) Time to throw out that rotten stinking orange thing you’re sick of waking up and trying not to vomit at when looking at each morning. But enough about Trump, start thinking about taking down your Halloween decorations too.

8.) If our society continues and so does Star Wars, in a generation, people will be like “Porgs were badass! Lurbs are just crass marketing!” another generation “Lurbs were badass! Blofs are just crass marketing!” but they will always have just been crass marketing, Ewoks on down.

9.) I feel like maybe what we’re doing here is autopsies on ideas that may have died natural or may have been murdered. Cultural pathologists, maybe that’s what we are. Coroners of the past.

10.) Go easy on your eyebrows, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

11.) If I taught a literature class, I would definitely dad-joke “This Class Is So Lit!” until one of the students mercy-killed me.

12.) I kind of hope that future archeologists will think that anything with “Made In The USA” will think they are objects of worship for a goddess called Maiden Theusa.

13.) Vader’s all about that base, all about that base, those rebels.

14.) Just keep your mouth shut all the time, a friend of the devil is a friend of mimes, do creepy things in return for dimes and no one will sleep well toniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight…

15.) False king Trump was a nasty old lump and a nasty old lump was he, he called for his Senate and you knew that he meant it when he called for his diddlers three.

16.) The toy prizes are… interesting… at Otaku Bell.

17.) It seems I am right on the edge between Generation X and The Millenials so I suppose I’ll identify with whichever group is more broke.


Loading comments...

You must be logged in to comment. Please sign in or join Prosebox to leave a comment.