november opening barrage in idea barrages

1.) As a child, you eat a bunch of candy on Halloween. As an adult, tomorrow morning I go get a cavity drilled and don’t eat any candy because I have to be low-carb now. Peter Pan may have had an idea there.

2.) Your soft-reboot sequel to THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST will be called PASSION OF THE CHRIST: RESURRECTION.

3.) Having worked feature film sets in the past twice, in what feels like another life, it is weird to be nominally on the other side. Driving home from the dentist, passing the lookilous that stand in the rain, queued up to see if the gods in the teevee actually wear flesh from time to time. I guess I’ve walked both sides and believe I held stride, both fetching sodas for famous people and being a person as well. Still, the whole thing makes me feel more liminal than usually, I suppose.

4.) After civilization falls a couple times and records are scarce, I hope Halloween is remembered as the holiday “Candygive”.

5.) If I was a discount OB-GYN, I would advertise my C-section services as “cutting out the middle man!”

6.) The final pup in a dog race is last but not leashed.

7.) If I was dying of thirst, I couldn’t stop myself from yelling the pun “GET WELL SOON!” as I expired. I’m like that.

8.) The only reason they pulled the drug deal off was that the undercover cop fell asleep but I guess that’s just narcolepsy.