622 in idea barrages

1.) Mothra picks up a human in a thick down jacket and comments to Godzilla, “you can tell winter’s coming from their coats.”

2.) I kind of want to make something titled “Nopin’ For A Miracle”.

3.) Your line of practical-joke trick bras will be called PRANKS FOR THE MAMMARIES.

4.) Two clouds hover over a crowd, one says to the other, “You know, if you squint, they kind of look like a cumulus.”

5.) Last night’s dream, someone stole a $15 takeout dinner from me and I went on a scorched Earth path of vengeance about it.

6.) A craft-beer supply store, a large photo by the door: “Your Facial Hair Must Be [THIS] Outrageous To Legally Purchase Supplies.”

7.) I swear this dog has an auxiliary colon where he stores extra poop so he can poop for Ma when she gets home from work. He is insane.

8.) “Sleep in,” said the wise old worm to the wormlets, “for it is the ambitious worms who are devoured by that goddamned early bird.”

9.) If you wanna repel flies, like any sane person would, put out vinegar. Don’t waste your honey. Save it for tea or something.

10.) Pennies saved or earned? Billionaires inherit or steal, they don’t save or earn. They have you worrying about pennies to distract from that.