may 24 in idea barrages

1.) When someone tries to sell you homeopathic stuff, put a penny in their hand and take it back then say “homeopathic money”. They LOVE it.

2.) If you make a horror movie about the Spring-Heeled Jack myth today, go with the title JUMPSCARE. I mean, why not?

3.) Your bakery/table top gaming store will be called ROLL INITIATIVE.

4.) Living in a kind of America only the sickest paranoiac could’ve imagined 30 yrs ago, now understanding why they wanted to hide. I wanna too.

5.) When you break a tire up into little bits to better control it, that’s Balkanized rubber.

6.) Write a book about beer being invented by aliens under the pen name Erich von Heineken.

7.) Open up a shipping company called Not Pornography and stamp Not Pornography in big letter on all the packages.

8.) Whenever a conspiracy crank starts talking to you about The Philadelphia Experiment, start talking about the invention of cream cheese.