end of june barrage in idea barrages

1.) The 3rd Three Ninjas movie should’ve had MC Hammer play the villain and should’ve been called “Three Ninjas Three: Three Legit Three Quit”.

2.) Discovery Health should do a reality show about penile enlargement surgeries called “Pimp My Rod”.

3.) The idea of a drill sergeant in the KISS Army is hilarious. “YOU CALL THAT FACE MAKE-UP, SCUM?”

4.) Cooking terms that sound like the names of metal bands: EMULSIFIER
Cooking terms that sound like the names of metal bands: MACERATOR
Cooking terms that sound like the names of metal bands: ACIDULATE
Cooking terms that sound like the names of metal bands: DECANTER
Cooking terms that sound like the names of metal bands: DEVEINED

5.) It is impossible to wear a dust mask without busting out your worst Bane impression.

6.) Did they at least call the porno spoof “Grinding Nemo” not “A Finding Nemo XXX Parody”?

7.) When you’re the culturally assumed default, a pride day isn’t needed, every day is heterosexual pride day sadly, you jackhashes.

8.) Too much Shark Week can lead to Toxic Shark Syndrome.

9.) Some of us tear down a wall, some of us build a bridge, some of us punch cracks in the night to maybe let the light in.

10.) Baker’s Corner - Baker’s Chocolate - “Great for Baking!” Gentlemen, we have discovered the most redundant food package.

11.) If you think about it, a baby-proofed house wouldn’t have a bunch of little plastic gates, it’d just be… condoms everywhere.

12.) Santa’s jolly belly is textbook glad-bod.

13.) If you have a landline phone in Mobile Alabama, can you legally claim it is your Mobile phone to pretend you can afford one?

14.) When someone uses the internet neologism “af” just assume they mean “anal fire”.