518 in idea barrages

1.) The best way to understand America’s Funniest Home Videos is to repose the theme song as questions: “America, America, is this you?”

2.) Maybe the orange creature misspoke and intends to start enough wars to Make Guernica Resonate Again.

3.) “Human Resources” is so euphemistic, just call ‘em The Firing Squad.

4.) The most cogent Trump impression would not involve aping his literal mannerisms, rather you’d stomp around screaming “BLEEDEEBLAHDEEBLOO!”

5.) And on the pedestal these words appear:/”My name is Ozymandias king of kings”/the rest, behind a paywall/which explains all sorts of things.

6.) If you think a law affirming basic human rights is an attack on your values, your knowledge of law is even worse than your values.

7.) And the internet rose as one to say “only men should shoot dick lasers at ghosts!” while the world burnt down around them. At least Nero played sweetly.

8.) “Christians” hating the poor & their neighbors makes sense when you remember Christianity only survived via Roman cultural appropriation.

9.) The tale of the golden goose is built around an egg maguffin.

10.) If you are to be judged by the nature of the enemies you make, the new Ghostbusters will be Citizen goddamn Kane.

11.) Treating a premature ejaculation disorder can be very touch and go.

12.) Things like Candidate Trump can only happen when thousands of cowards act on their short-term self interest and nothing else, together.

13.) There will be a TETRIS movie because the money men behind the movies would rather fail with an excuse than risk real success.

14.) Not that there’s not new ideas, fresh ideas, better ideas, it’s that none of those ideas would benefit the regimes at the reigns. Remember.