322 in idea barrages

1.) The hope is Trump tries to announce Billy Fuccillo as his Vice President then breaks down laughing, admitting it was all a gag.

2.) Everyone’s afraid of a robot uprising, I’d be a lot more afraid of toilets. Who would have more reason to hate us than toilets?

3.) Since “men’s rights activists” love those fedoras so much, can we call them fedophiles?

4.) Arrange “Electric Boogie” as a folk song, release “Acoustic Boogie” to the world, get all the money.

5.) Most importantly, if you’re agreeing with Jesus about something “Nailed it!” is an insensitive response.

6.) Sometimes we must burn our bridges so that on the way back we can jump the rivers on motorcycles like total badasses.

7.) Problem is, the working poor on both sides don’t have time for/access to deep political coverage & so vote for the person they’ve heard of.

8.) Upside to being unphotogenic is I don’t havta waste time finding a good picture of myself for social media. It’s impossible to begin with.

9.) O hast thou discernment of sight/twixt Pit & The Light/azure yonder & hurt/lush meadow & battered sword/grin & disguise/hast thou even eyes?

10.) One man’s Washington, another man’s Che, about the only difference, to whom your loans are paid.

11.) The weird thing about girding yourself for rejection is when you’re not, when they like you, all the nervous energy doesn’t know what to do.

12.) If I met Fred Durst’s wife, I would repeatedly refer to her as “The Durst Lady”.