1128 in idea barrages

1.) The insistent frat boy wouldn’t take bro for an answer.

2.) I like how Smashmouth named their band after what their music makes your fist want to do.

3.) If you can’t stand the heat, get out to Kitchener!

4.) Whoever is dogging you with desire, there’s still nothing “thirstier” than Microsoft wanting to upgrade to Windows 10 and chill.

5.) Everyone remembers the Batusi but it is the sad fate of sidekicks that no one remembers its counterpart, The Dick Move.

6.) Ultra-traditional fetishists don’t use safe words, they prefer to use choke signals.

7.) The anti-women’s-rights movement in America is every bit as much a religious terrorist movement as is ISIS.

8.) Do the British say “Jesus Haitch Christ”? That’d be adorable.

9.) “Prosperity Christianity” is aspirational. “Black Friday Shopping” is aspirational. Choking on your own vomit is aspirational.

10.) If you save the life of a wookie chef, his whisk is your command.

11.) A country western song about Twitter entitled “All These Sexists Live In Texas”.

12.) At this point, 95% of all Kenny Rogers concert tickets are purchased as gifts by confused relatives thinking he’s Willie Nelson.

13.) One anagram for Paula Deen is “A Nude Leap” God help us all.

14.) I wonder how much of the Dodgers Twitter world is people just posting “That’ll do, Puig, that’ll do” over and over again.

15.) The End Times, the apocalyptic myth, is just the Black Friday con writ large, a pitch to make you consume, quickly and stupidly.

16.) “The Tempest” recontextualized to the dawning of the Industrial Age and re-titled “Mage Against The Machine”.