717 in idea barrages

1.) You don’t hear enough about how penicillin is the cure for a penis that’s illin’.

2.) The superstitious Italian chef always had to carry his lucky penne.

3.) Just a bunch of beer promoters drivin’ around in modified ambulances, calling themselves “Thirst Responders”.

4.) Belle went to the OBGYN for confirmation but she knew what it was, it was a beast infection.

5.) If you drink heavily while watching “Plan Nine From Outer Space”, you eventually get all Tor up.

6.) If you won’t vote because you need a candidate who is ideologically flawless, man, I dunno, get in line to be a serf again.

7.) I like to think that Guy Fieri drinks Axe Cologne instead of water.

8.) Plushies don’t get married, per se, but they do have kermitment ceremonies.