113 in idea barrages

1.) Your next band will be named “Whooping Kafka”. Don’t look at me, I don’t make the rules, I just relay them.

2.) When Skynet goes live, think of all the twitterbots that’ll suddenly hate you for not following back. NO WONDER THEY KILL US.

3.) If you’re gonna write erotic crossover fan fiction between Flo from Progressive & Cmdr. Data, at LEAST call it “Florence & The Machine”.

4.) Whenever I watch workers diligently making products on HOW ITS MADE, I imagine how they cut corners when the camera’s not there.

5.) If music be the food of love, let us have fat-people sex.

6.) I long for the day “Fallout Boy” is simply a Simpsons reference again.

7.) Love when neocons who tell us we can’t judge all cops for thousands of abuses then tell us to judge all Muslims for a handful of attacks.

8.) I demand a David Bowie endorsed cologne called “Eau! You Pretty Things”.