NYD in idea barrages

  • Jan. 1, 2015, 7:03 a.m.
  • |
  • Public

1.) The puppet was using nearly-contemporary slang. That’s it. That’s the joke.

2.) I look up in the night sky & I hope that it’s not empty, that someone or something’s gonna save us from ourselves. But no. It’s on us.

3.) As last words go, let’s face it, “suck gas, evildoer!” would not be the worst choice.

4.) Still, though, “I am The MTV Beach House Tiki God, coming up next, Daria” is the platonic ideal of last words.

5.) Rick Astley and Kate Bush are just short a singer named Mary, then they’ll form their super-group…

6.) In 2014, I’ve acted with Gary Gnu and various puppets, drawn on my stomach in Syracuse, published more poetry, sang more songs, hosted open mics at cafes and old folks homes, MCed for charity, had the gout and a cyst the size of a lemon on my back, donated old movie stuff to a burlesque show, accidentally met Gallagher, worked on this goddamned novel some more and all kinds of stuff. 2015, I need steady money, a dating life again and more travel. I am near a critical mass of something good. Lets do this.

7.) Oh yeah, it’s easy to crush on a bad boy when he’s an eternally-twenty blandly handsome vampire. Crush on Gargamel if you like bad so much.

8.) I blame the entertainment industry’s obsession with its own awards season for movies in January being almost uniformly terrible.


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