april 22 in idea barrages

If we were meant to have hardwood floors, God or nature or evolution or whatever wouldn’t have given us feet designed perfectly for walking on lush fluffy grass with springy soil beneath, nature’s version of wall-to-wall shag carpeting.

When we were hunter-gatherers, positive accomplishment was rewarded mildly, with a nicer meal, while a negative accomplishment starved us to death or got us eaten by a lion. That anxiety response loop worked well for then, terribly for now, but it’s still written into our genes.

Turns out aging isn’t what puts you out of touch w/ evolving culture, it’s isolation from reality that comes with decades of success that does it & you’re only allowed to hear from old successes who’ve decayed away in echo chambers. Elders who actually continued learning are rad!

A parody of “No Diggity” involving the line “I like your leather jerkin, so wizardly, so wizardly”.

Had you thought your brain was strong, jeopardy would’ve proven you wrong. You needed to have answered that in the form of a question. All this and more could’ve been yours, had the price been right. Would the real you had only stood up,

Powering a starship with the power of Hot Pockets and Cold Pockets annihilating each other and releasing pure energy is a great plan that is only thwarted by the lack of Cold Pockets.

The more interconnected we are through the internet, the lonelier we get, because it’s a shallow connection. Social media quips are fun in small doses but it’s all empty calories with no micro-nutrients. Our souls grow both fat AND malnourished, if this is ALL that we have.

Why call them “restaurant theft accomplices” when you can call them “Hamburglar Helpers”?