dc6 in idea barrages

When a hipster cuts their finger, the only disinfectant they can abide is Retrosporin.

Yeah, you get up early if you like worms. That’s weird, wanting to eat worms but you do you. I was not born in a powdered wig, I’m not here to judge. Enjoy! After you’re done, swing through Mickey Ds for two sausage-egga muffins & a large coffee for me. I’ll be up 11-ish.

I think we could fix a lot of the problems with horse racing if we just passed a rule that if the horse has to be euthanized, so do the jockey, the trainers and all the owners. Seems only fair.

The internet’s only taught us one thing: Fandom Was A Mistake. Not liking things, not appreciating artists, not digging what you dig but coming together as “communities” to put all your headspaces/cash into people, real or imagined, that you’ll never really know? Total disaster.

I think the world is ready for a collaboration between the titular voice-actor from the cartoon “Doug” and whoever currently owns the rights to “The Humpty Dance” centering around the line “I’m Doug Funnie, but hey, I’m makin’ money”.

Buying blue checks anywhere just seems like a desperate bid for relevance or authority, when it’s clear you have no other way to create that illusion. They’re the scam college diploma-mills of a person’s social credit score, nothing more.

An Eartha Kitt parody about falling in love with a luchadore called “Santos Baby”.

The spoon thought the dish was the love of its life but, man, if you run out on one partner, it just means you’re gonna run out on another. In seven months, the dish met a lovely insulated tumbler and ran off with her instead. Poor spoon. The whole spice rack tried to tell her.