dec 30 in idea barrages

Since “pomme de terre” is French for potato, I hope a vodka sommelier is called a “pommelier”.

The realization that with the proper slant pronunciation “Guy Fieri” can rhyme with “Mom’s spaghetti” opens up a rich vein of Eminem-based comedy.

Did Buffy ever call anyone “DIS-count Dracula”? I feel like that’s something Buffy would say.

National Grid killed the power in the neighborhood for construction. Had to use the flashlight on my cellphone in the bathroom, just like they did in the covered wagons crossing the west.

Tried flipping through the book by Rowling to see how obvious the bigotry was supposed to be. Couldn’t get 10 pages in to even see, it was that horribly overwritten. Everything was described for like four paragraphs for no discernable reason. Could’ve written the same 10 pages in 2. Blegh.

Cyborg snapping turtles as lawn Rhoombas.

Yes, I was singing to “Day-Oh” the lyrics “Here in MacDonaldland we don’t sell no bananas (Buy some burgers or just go home)”. This is what you get when you’re me. This is what happens.

If not for McDonalds claiming the name “GRIMACE” for a weird milkshake monster, it would’ve been a great name for a metal band. “FOR WE ARE THE GRIM ACES OF GRIMNESS, WE ARE THE GRIMACE!” Multinational corporations, ruining everything.