the ides of april 2 in idea barrages

1.) Japan predicted the entire internet when it invented pornographic cat girls. Good job, I... think?

2.) Look, as long as snow doesn't stick to the road and melts in the morning, it isn't really snow. It is just a dream of snow.

3.) It's a reality competition show to build the best golden calf. It's AMERICAN FALSE IDOL. It's basically the best.

4.) Up here in the Adirondacks, we don't say "when it rains, it pours". We say "when it rains, it snows". Makes more sense up here.

5.) Restructure thinking. Create epic narrative to live within. The Odyssey, maybe. Except in reverse. Lost where you came from.

6.) So our two best hitters right now are Duda and Lagares but Lagares is injured and Duda could sit for Ike? Lovely,@Mets. Lovely.

7.) Planet Fitness's ads targeting the people who'll sign up then never use their services is a particularly cynical tactic. Probably works too.

8.) If you're dodging your taxes, you're dodging America's future. Taxation is patriotic.