feb 22 in idea barrages

Every two months, we should just get a mandatory four-day weekend that involves a 32-hour “healing coma” where we just get knocked out at midnight and wake up, eight AM two days later, actually refreshed for once. That’d be rad.

I hope the next imaginary white people name to come out of suburban Utah is “Kenjamin”. I can totally see the back-up quarterback for a bad NFL team being named “Kenjamin Young” in 25 years.

I am the cat’s massage chair except instead of being paid in crisp five-dollar bills, I am paid in tiny bleeding claw marks all over my body.

Just because of his name, I can’t help but think that the delay on the Game Of Thrones books is because of the wacky hijinks of George RR Martin’s sassy girlfriend Gina.

Blood is thicker than water. Bud Light is just barely thicker than water.

Yoda rapping “HOT IN HERE IT GETS, TAKE OUT ALL YOUR CLONES YOU SHOULD”.

Most people don’t vote for policies, sadly, they vote for a leadership that justifies and legitimizes their biases. Sometimes that’s a good thing. Most of the time, it is very very bad.

I hope when Taylor Swift bottoms out, she’ll endorse a Seen On TV clothes mending gadget called Taylor Swift’s Swift Taylor. (I also hope for the Michael Fassbender Bassfinder.)