littlefallsmets ⋅ 45 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,130
Page 97 of 206
au10 in idea barrages
1.) Unlike the Constructicons, however, the Deconstructicons are not six Decepticons who join together into one larger robot to battle Optimus Prime, rather they are six Decepticons who split int...
au9 in idea barrages
1.) It was hard to tell if they were a hair-metal band or just being ironic, the whole thing was incredibly glambiguous. 2.) What was my generation’s obsession with irony but an intellectual vers...
au8 in idea barrages
1.) When you graduate from Mohel College, they play “Pomp and Circumcision”. 2.) A Batman themed prom called “A Knight To Remember” will never happen but it would be the first actually interestin...
au7 in idea barrages
1.) Ah, El Pollo Loco. The Mexican chain you only go to if every Mexican chain other than Taco Bell is unavailable. 2.) We need a famous couple that’s a Jennifer and an Eric (or Erica!) so that t...
au6 in idea barrages
1.) If you skulk around apiaries, you’re a bee creeper. 2.) Technically, Blur’s “Song 2” would mash-up well with Rob Thomas’s “Smooth” but… it would only bring Song 2 down. WOO-HOO! 3.) The Harve...
au5 in idea barrages
1.) I tell the cat “Kitty wants pets? But kitty IS pets!” but he seems to not appreciate my sparkling wordplay. 2.) An emo insult comic with the stage name “Call Out Boy”. 3.) Tonight, I have rea...
au4 in idea barrages
1.) Garfield was named as such because his mother gave birth to him in a field of gar. 2.) Vegan rappers don’t have beef, they have tofeuds. 3.) I think it’s nice that we have a word for complete...
the scale of rhyming consequences in poetry
there are many levels to the Scale of Rhyming Consequences you may not be technically cruising for a bruising but you may well be asking for a taking to a taxing or demandi...
clean sweep in poetry
whenever I’m cleaning in any kind of meaningful way more than just doing dishes clothes or straightening up the dog and the cat always look up at me with mock surprise the dog and t...
oysters rock-a-fella in poetry
the good news is yes, the world is your oyster the bad news is an oyster is a little bit of snot trapped in an angry rock people pretend is delicious just to gross you the hell out ...
He should’ve been in Southern California playing first-base for the Dodgers, had life gone the way it seemed into his teens, “Big Ben” Eisen then, nicknamed so for breaking the scoreboard clock w...
au3 in idea barrages
1.) A parody of “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” about Bela Lugosi’s dad? 2.) Everybody pretends to be so sanctimonious pure when talking about “refusing to vote for the lesser of two evils” but do y’know wh...
au2 in idea barrages
1.) Saw my dad in a dream this afternoon, napping after getting up at the crack of something to pick mom up from the airport. We went thrifting. It was nice. 2.) If you have a fetish for Japanese...
au1 in idea barrages
1.) I wonder if when the Powerpuff Girls hit puberty, they’ll grow fingers. 2.) I am irrationally bothered when people speak the phrase Super Mario Brothers out-loud as “Super Mario Bros”. Youtub...
july capstone in idea barrages
1.) The love of watching people embarrass the crap out of themselves using social-media neologisms in real life conversation is called “fleekophilia”. 2.) Yes, I was singing “The Night Chicago Di...
jl30 in idea barrages
1.) Yoda narrating my life: “Begun, The Cleaning Wars have.” 2.) If you want a good rap battle, you have to be very diss-organized. 3.) If you slurp your soup too fast at the sushi bar and get it...
jl29 in idea barrages
1.) One of the few good things about the Mets churning through AAAA dross looking for non-embarrassing middle relief arms this year is sometimes one of the bad news bullpen names is really funny:...
jl28 in idea barrages
1.) Build the world’s fastest waterslide and call it The Tubin’ Missile Crisis. 2.) Now you got me singing Electric Light Orchestra’s “Mister Blue Sky” as “This Gnu Guy”, Great Space Coaster, jus...
jl27 in idea barrages
1.) I mean, I sing HOLD ME CLOSER TINY PANTHER to the cat too but then the dog gets all jealous and pissy. 2.) Today’s serenade to the woof-creature has been to the tune of “Day-Oh”: Hey, Mister ...
I’m not saying this is true or not, Frank couldn’t tell me either way himself, he could only repeat what he’d been told. The busking license his friend carried read “Cesar Zimmerman” a name he cl...
It wasn’t that she was ugly because she certainly was not, the problem was more simply that she wasn’t perfect. Looks are not the measure of a woman or a man, of course, but even if they were, by...
jl26 in idea barrages
1.) Every business you think millenials are “killing” because they don’t spend money on it anymore is something they’d like to spend money on except the middle-class has been gutted so that douch...
jl25 in idea barrages
1.) I wonder if they had to re-title “Die Hard” for German markets so no one would think it was a porno. 2.) It’s weird the way post 9/11 America has fetishized security protocols like a badge of...
j24 in idea barrages
1.) I wonder how many Starfleet personnel refuse assignment on ships named Enterprise, like, “nah, man, the Enterprises always, like, time travel and fight demi-gods and stuff, I just signed on t...
j23 in idea barrages
1.) Call your bat mitzvah band “Jem and the Challahgrams”. 2.) A cooking show that incorporates stand-up comics would be pretty cool. I would called it “Flavor Bombed”. 3.) Repeatedly hitting you...
