littlefallsmets ⋅ 45 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,129
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nov 26 in idea barrages
Your corporation’s leader of COVID compliance should be called a Chief Personal Protection Practice Officer so she or he can call her or himself the company’s “C-3P-O”. The maximal name for a...
nov 25 in idea barrages
If the couple are supervillains, is the honey-do list a honey-doom list? I kind of get it when a small news websites hit me with the “YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF PROTECTING YOUR COMPUTER FROM VI...
nov 24 in idea barrages
The woman in the stirrups looked down in stunned silence that her 14 hours of labour produced not a human baby but rather a piping hot pizza. “It wasn’t delivery,” the doctor sadly intoned, “it...
nov 23 in idea barrages
I saw a sign for a Chinese restaurant called Great Wall and I was transfixed with how awesome it would be if it just said “Eat Wall”. When I win the lotto, I shall bribe them to remove the G an...
nov 22 in idea barrages
I knew a man Bazinga and he mocked the weird With worn-out tropes Nerd cliches, a dumb catchphrase and forced laugh-track Dashing all hope He feigned OCD He feigned OCD Mocking a real disease M...
prompt: wager, title: it happened here in misc. flash fiction
Your failure saved the world, you know. Yes, you. The one reading this. This message has been distributed publicly so you won’t end up targeted, like shortwave broadcasts available anywhere but d...
nov 21 in idea barrages
There are worse noms-de-guerre than “Carlton Banksy” I suppose. Why not call wedding receptions “happily-ever afterparties”? This life’s disappointments almost uniformly flow from how so ma...
nov 20 in idea barrages
Yes, IN SECURITY would’ve been a much much much better title for PAUL BLART MALL COP than PAUL BLART MALL COP but the pun would’ve surely been wasted on such a terrible film that only existed f...
nov 19 in idea barrages
It’s a good thing Hoobastank disappeared like the stank of a Hooba grazing in the distance on a stiff breeze before we had the cross-promotion of Hoobastank Hubba Bubba gum, that phrase would’v...
nov 18 in idea barrages
“Abundance” he muttered. “Thanks,” she replied, “that means a lot.” I mean, we still don’t have a Christopher Lloyd endorsed liquor called “Great Scotch!” That’s disappointing. Remember the...
nov 17 in idea barrages
When I was young, if you’d mentioned “waterboarding”, you’d’a just thought it was an old person trying to remember the word for “surfing”. It’s good the horrors are no longer secret but it’s st...
nov 16 in idea barrages
I think fan-fiction crossovers COULD be fun, but it’s always something boring as hell, like… Stephen Universe meets Adventure Time or Sailor Moon meets Dragonballz. Now, Popeye meets The Tempes...
short form improv show pitch in life stuff and misc.
Dicey Propositions (or Natural Ds) (or Roll for Inspiration) (or Audiences & Idiots) (or Imps & Idiots) A short-form improv show built around the conceit that the scenes and characters a...
“You got a fast car.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” It went on like that. They didn’t have a Ouija board or a tarot deck in that small shack, so they augured with what was to hand. Board games,...
nov 15 in idea barrages
Go into the store. Swap the labels on the marshmallow Fluff and the mayo. Make the world a weirder place. Don’t worry about expanding your orchestra. There’s always room for cello. A film w...
nov 14 in idea barrages
Lazy fish-mongers are a leading cause of mackerel degeneration. The measure of intellect is not in being right. Any damned fool can be right, by aping someone else or by random chance. The me...
sometimes it’s a leaf on the breeze or maybe a fabric tag flickering in the corner of my eye-line a flash of movement at the periphery of my senses and I forget that he is gone a belo...
nov 13 in idea barrages
Sonic the Hedgehog online fandom ruined the phrase “Knuckles Sandwich”. Substituting Bob Marley for Jacob Marley makes it a whole different story, is all I’m saying. Meg White’s evil oppos...
nov 12 in idea barrages
You could write a hell of a parody of The Band’s “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down” about the irony of Herman Cain decrying COVID as a hoax then dying of it. “Herman Cain was the name and he...
nov 11 in idea barrages
Two out of three Stooges agree, the other is Fine. A rap version of THE MONSTER MASH built around a sample of someone yelling “Hey! Must be the mummy!” All I really know is, if you drove a ...
nov 10 in idea barrages
The thing, Parsifal WAS the Fisher King… and the Red Knight & Arthur too, the same man, at different points on their path, different aspects of that journey, subsuming & generating each...
nov 9 in idea barrages
I mean, SHARK TANK sucks but if it had the funnier title 90-DAY FINANCER, I’d at least give it points for the title. Imagining Sesame Street as the vivid hallucinations of an acid-fiend where...
nov 8 in idea barrages
“I’m being ironic, it’s a prank, bro, it’s a social experiment!” said the edgelord as he withered away into a corncob with a Hot Topic sticker on it. “Spicy-and-Sweet Loaf Cereal” is just a l...
prompt: fair, title: the type of thief in misc. flash fiction
They say the place is thief-proof and that’s fair, it probably is, at least for certain definitions of “thief”. Even if you’re the greatest thief alive, as some say of me, which is also fair, I p...
nov 7 in idea barrages
Another teevee ad for a prescription drug where the generic could be split in two and it’d be a perfect name for an NPR reporter. “Dupi Lumab, All Things Considered.” My anxiety and panic are...
