littlefallsmets ⋅ 45 ⋅
I write words, I sometimes get to perform them out, sometimes I'm even paid. And I'm trying to get it right, get it right.
with enough repetition, your flaws become your style
Entries 5,131
Page 116 of 206
o4 in idea barrages
1.) Not only is the “DIE HARD is the best Christmas movie” meme annoying as hell but it’s also false. BATMAN RETURNS, c’mon. 2.) Cats and dogs are wonderful because they don’t know the state of t...
o3 in idea barrages
1.) All the ancient men with their pumped up dicks, takin’ pills takin’ pills, boners at a hundred… 2.) Success doesn’t make you a good person. If you succeeded by hurting others, you are bad and...
o2 in idea barrages
1.) “Learn to speak human” I tell the dog “and I can help you better. Doesn’t even have to be English, I speak some French, Pop knows Russian.” 2.) My body itself is a first world problem. Trying...
sympathy for the devil we knew in poetry
I went to a K-Mart going-out-of-business sale to mourn a kind of America that has passed way maybe no less evil in its consumerism but certainly less invasive when at least the rich pe...
o1 in idea barrages
1.) No one refers to their disease as “moderate to severe” outside of commercials. Maybe moderate OR severe but never both. 2.) I listen to the late-night paranormal radio shows and think “Ah the...
to the tune of LOVE SHACK in song parodies
if you see a light-up sign by the cinema door that says “fifteen films based on Lovecraft” Lovecraft, H.P. you’re headin’ down Miskatonic Highway what’s the source, literarily? headed for t...
s30 in idea barrages
1.) Calling “Saranac Thursdays” “the Sarnac Pit” is a very niche-specific joke. 2.) There’s multiple musicals about Jesus being a hippie but none about Jesus being a beatnik, which would really b...
to the tune of WORKING CLASS HERO in song parodies
as soon as you’re born you’re in Burger King hell God help you if you’re sent off to the Taco Bell God can’t help you with the things that McDonalds sells a working class gyro is something...
s29 in idea barrages
1.) Sing a Dave Matthews song as a pirate and it sounds like you’re at a pet-related car accident. “Crash into me deer?!” 2.) A badboy tennis star falls in love with his parole officer in COURT A...
to the tune of Prince's Kiss in song parodies
don’t have to be beautiful to turn on Don just drink a lot of fluids from dusk till dawn you don’t need experience you don’t need clout you just have to save it all up and know when to l...
to the tune of END OF THE LINE in song parodies
well it’s all right, walking against a stiff breeze well it’s all right, be trapped in a box if you please well it’s all right, pulling invisible rope well it’s all right, whatever you ...
to the tune of Karma Police in song parodies
Carmel police, arrest this man he prefers nougat he wants it pretzel-filled he wants some sea salt on it Carmel police, arrest this girl she wants some Reeses that she can go...
broke as a joke in poetry
If it ain’t broke, maybe it is actually broke and its trying to distract from its brokenness with folksy-ass words like “ain’t”. If it ain’t broke, maybe its just that its investments aren...
waxen wings in poetry
maybe Icarus had to be rash enough to fly too close to the sun if he was going to be able to try and fly at all, you know? Icarus did die a free man after all, there’s something to that Icaru...
we’re not so different myself and the dog with the tail that curls both we sniff around, maybe leave a mark both just wanna go out into the world maybe meet a girl maybe make some barks my mo...
sonnet the hedgehog in poetry
got-TA go FAST I MUST grab RINGS all NIGHT got-TA go FAST can-NOT hit SPIKES or DROWN got-TA go FAST there ARE egg-MEN to FIGHT got-TA go FAST ro-BOTS con-TROL the TOWN got-TA go FAST Se-...
The idea that if we just sat down and made friends with Nazi Germany they’d’ve stopped is as ridiculous as staying that with the KKK. Or the Proud Boys or any other little boys of the Alt-Reich...
making a killing in poetry
the angry old man out of touch sitting on his laurels and millions made in a past before we understood the viewpoints of the oppressed yells “Political correctness is killing comedy!” or mayb...
my heart as a ratty thrift-store jacket with a wad of hundos sewn into the lining if only you’d check my heart as a day-glo marshmallow cereal with one hell of a free prize inside if you ...
the past is not even past in poetry
imagine if reincarnation turns out to be real then we figured out a way to exactly determine who everyone was in all of their past lives and you’re held up to the achievement standards of th...
s28 in idea barrages
1.) We are one Sunday away from the usurper-in-chief dropping an “uppity” and all hell breaking loose. 2.) If I ever have to amputated, I hope to tattoo black rings and CRAYOLA on it so that it l...
s26 in idea barrages
1.) Carmel Police, arrest this man, he prefers nougat, he wants it pretzel-filled, he wants some sea salt on it… this is what you get, this is what you get, this is what you get and it’s packed w...
s25 in idea barrages
1.) Whenever people talk about safe sex I always hear Marge Simpson saying “Lisa Needs Braces!” & Lenny saying “Dental Dam!” over & over again. 2.) My pitch for a funeral home sitcom is j...
s24 in idea barrages
1.) It’s ALMOST like Putin’s fake president will do anything to insult a woman or black man of power & accomplishment. 2.) “Political correctness is killing comedy!” Or… maybe if you can’t be...
the world's probably ending but not by rogue planet barrage in idea barrages
1.) Jockeys often win races using stall tactics. 2.) singing “It was called America Dad… about as funny as gettin’ punched in the face… woo-ooo…“ 3.) The jackoffs in the pick-up flying a Confeder...
