Random Statement in Book Seven: Reconstruction 2020

Now or later, when Martha moves out, I’m especially reminded that… if I had a good desktop computer and business-line at home? On non-court days, I wouldn’t need to leave my house. Which would free me up to take care of things like my dog, my house, and my yard. That being said… I say it largely because I am really trying to get motivated and bust my ass (mentally speaking) on getting my own shit sorted.

FOR EXAMPLE: I have the next three days scheduled. STRICTLY scheduled. Because I’m not going to bloody float through life. Yes, I’ve accomplished what I set out to do. I am a full time prosecutor in the state of Iowa with a house and a dog. I have begun the legal process of separating from my wife, which was never the goal but is a damned necessary thing to do to wrestle my life back to being MY LIFE as opposed to My Life Taking Care of Laziness.

Though… yes, the reason I give Martha “too much credit” is because I fear I don’t credit her with some of the things she does that I don’t care about but that she does. For example, I inherited a couch from my late grandfather. Nala, on one of her “I’m not in my kennel cuz Mommy doesn’t put me there” naughty rants… ate part of the couch. No skin off my nose. If someone walks into my house and judges me negatively because a part of my couch has a hole in the fabric, I don’t care. However, Martha spent a good hour or so patching that hole last night. SHE almost certainly sees it as “going the extra mile to do something for Chris and for the house”… I… don’t. Because if it were me by myself… I wouldn’t have sewed a patch into it. I would have either ignored it or stapled it. So… sometimes I do give her credit for the things like “She actually put the dishes away!” or “Thank Christ she did Laundry without me asking her to” because I don’t give her credit for things like “Sewing the couch” or “writing the check for the utility bill.” Of course, that being said? I’m still who and where I am. I’m still the person that is annoyed by having to (repeatedly) ask her to do things with her absolute long days of time. It does annoy me that she takes the dog for a walk maybe once or twice a week. I’m filling in there because the dog NEEDS to be walked. It does annoy me that I often have to ask her to help me cook dinner or do things around the house. It does annoy me that the recycling piles up for months because she feels the need to rinse it all and place it somewhere before we can take it to redemption. She does things the hardest way possible or the way that takes the longest time IF SHE DOES THEM AT ALL.

Which leads me to the discussion we had last night. I asked her if the papers came in for her to sign. She says they did not. So I will e-mail the lawyer today to follow up. Because… I’m to a point where I honestly can’t say WITH CONFIDENCE that… I believe her fully. I’m not saying she’d lie to me or refuse to sign the papers… I’m just saying, I’m no longer in a place where I can take her word for it. So I’ll follow up with the lawyer to see where he is on getting the paperwork finalized. Then I asked Martha if she’d done anything to get a new place. Her response: “No. I haven’t had time.” (CUE RESISTED REACTION). I… kind of wanted to blow up at her. I really did. I wanted to yell at her and rehash every argument that we’ve had for the last 8 years. But I didn’t. Because getting angry and repeating myself wouldn’t mean a damned thing to her and would only serve to upset me. Instead, like a grown up, I need to acknowledge what she is saying, understand what she is meaning, and proceed from there. She is saying the process is something that she fears so she thinks the whole thing will take a full day to do. What I understand her meaning is that, like with everything else in our relationship, her fear is controlling her and she isn’t capable of moving forward on it at all. So my steps going forward need to be as follows:
(1) As I told her last night, I’ll institute a deadline if I have to. If I discover that there ARE places to live that she just is refusing to check out; I’ll institute an “out by this date or I move your stuff for you” deadline.
(2) For the next several days/weeks… I’ll make all the phone calls. I’ll follow every lead and churn up new leads. If every single rental property in IF says, “No availability. Try back in April;” then Martha and I will have to have another conversation (one largely about how to separate the house and house chores to get things done). On the other hand, if one or more properties say, “Great! How soon can you move in?” then I’ll turn that information over to Martha. If she still does nothing with that information? I’ll confirm move in details for her. And then… if she STILL DOESN’T MOVE despite everything being done FOR HER… I’ll pack her damned bags and drive her to the doorstep myself.

And now a break to give our Reverend Departed Geek Queen Mother a “Dolly Parton Challenge” Meme Moment:

Herein is some politics, so if you’d like to avoid it, rush down to the next meme.

Before I even get to the political item of the day (a small thing in most respects) I want to again bring up something that is important in the overall.

A president should be judged most by how his Cabinet works. Clinton’s Presidency was largely a massive success because of his Cabinet. George W could have been a mostly “place holder President” that “saw the Nation through 911” but for his Cabinet that so strongly pushed the Iraq War. Barack Obama was a mostly acceptable President policy-wise because, but for a few errors, he had a good (and stable) Cabinet. Trump, when he took office, promised that he would get “the best people” for his administration. With choices like Betsy Devos, Stephen Bannon, and Stephen Miller… he proved that his definition of “best people” VASTLY differs from “everyone else’s” definition of best people. BUT… lets say that we’re using HIS OWN rubric.
Donald Trump’s first National Security Adviser? Michael Flynn. Sentenced for lying to the FBI about creating a back-channel to the Russians to help Trump.
Donald Trump’s second National Security Adviser? H.R. McMaster. Trump fired him for disagreeing about “friendly overtures to the enemies of the United States”… namely, Trump’s penchant for kissing up to North Korea and Russia.
Donald Trump’s third National Security Adviser? John Bolton. Trump claims he fired Bolton, Bolton claims he resigned. The truth is expected to come out in Bolton’s Book but may be revealed through Impeachment Testimony if the votes are there.
Donald Trump’s fourth National Security Adviser (and current) is Robert C. O’Brien.

There are three takeaways to discuss here.

FIRST: The office of the National Security Adviser was first established in 1953. That is 67 years ago. There have only been 28 US National Security Advisers in the history of the office. (Technically less as there were some non-consecutive holders). But… there are 28 Official US National Security Advisers in our nation’s history. FOUR OF THEM have gone through the Trump administration IN HIS FIRST TERM IN OFFICE. So… 24… in 63 years… versus FOUR IN 3 YEARS! The average time in office for those first 24 people? Over 2.5 years. The average time in office for the last FOUR people in that office? 9 months. I know saying the current commander in chief is an erratic man-child more likely to throw tantrums and fire people than read a book is bloody obvious by now… but we should never forget just how unprecedented this Orange Fuck Up is.

TWO: Of the three people that have been terminated from the National Security Adviser position under Trump? We have a criminal, someone who was fired because “Trump wants to treat Russia better”, and someone who Trump fired because… according to Bolton… “Bolton would not support the debunked conspiracy that Ukraine, not Russia, hacked the US Election.” So… really… here’s the thing. REGARDLESS OF WHAT MUELLER OR IMPEACHMENT SAYS… the facts are as follows: Trump encouraged the Russians to hack the US Election. Trump has stated repeatedly that he would illegally accept “any help” from foreign powers willing to help him win elections. EVERY Intelligence Community in the US said Russia was responsible for hacking 2016. DESPITE bi-partisan congressional votes to sanction Russia; Trump refused to do so until he was essentially FORCED TO. In an unreported Oval Office meeting, Trump illegally divulged classified information about Israeli troop movements to Russian Officials. Trump has specifically said, on multiple occasions, that he believes Vladimir Putin over US Intelligence. As recently as LAST MONTH, Trump repeated that he believes the 2016 hack was Ukraine, maybe China… but not Russia. So friends… he may NOT be a Russian Agent.... and I KNOW he’s an idiot but I don’t think he’s a “useful idiot.” What I think, and have been saying all along, and then was essentially PROVEN BY THE MUELLER REPORT… is that Donald Trump has, was, and IS doing business in Russia. The oligarch money laundering. The attempts at hotel and land deals. Trump Tower and Golf Courses options. Trump, in his dealings with Russia, is not thinking about THE UNITED STATES or THE AMERICAN PEOPLE at all. Trump, as always, is thinking about Trump. How can HE make sure that his Russia Deals in his private business are secured.

THREE: I find it strange that the man who repeatedly said he’d “bring the best people” fired two of them and then dragged their name through the mud. McMaster was lambasted and ridiculed for “not being the guy” Trump thought he was. And Bolton was attacked as “too soft” when he first left… and is now being massively attacked since he’s saying, “Yeah. As everyone previously testified to. We all were aware that Trump stopped the Ukraine Aid because he wanted them to help his campaign. This was public knowledge.” So… again, as should surprise NOBODY that knows the man… Trump’s definition of “best people” is limited strictly to “who supports me, who will do everything I say, who will lie for me, who will sacrifice themselves on my account.” And actually has nothing to do with whether the person CAN do their job. Because as we saw with McMaster and Bolton… as soon as they start doing their job, they’re fired.

As I said? THAT wasn’t even the Trump stuff I wanted to talk about today. Because all of THAT is old news that everyone should already know about except for the fact that people are choosing willful active ignorance and/or getting all of their information solely from Fox News. And THAT is what I wanted to talk about.

Trump is blasting Fox News again. And here’s the batshit crazy thing, to me. WE ALL KNOW Fox News goes out of their way to be obsequious and accommodating to Trump. If there was a video of Jeanine Pirro, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, Tomi Lahren, Greg Gutfeld, and Jesse Watters masturbating to an insane drawing of Donald Trump… I wouldn’t even be surprised. BUT Fox News, despite their reputation, DOES STILL HAVE TO CONTAIN NEWS. So… periodically they’ll cover something that ISN’T Trump Worship. And, horrifyingly… seriously, this should terrify every single American… any time the channel shifts focus, Trump tweets or gives a Chopper Talk about how Fox is trying to be “politically correct” and has “completely lost focus on why people love Fox News.” Most recently, he went on a tantrum because Fox News dared to interview a Democrat on air and ask about Impeachment. GASP! A news program covering historic news and asking for multiple different perspectives?! MY GOD the insanity!! Except… no, that was sarcasm, and you’re a fucking idiot.

QUITE sincerely, I know he’s crossed the line into “likely an honest mental health problem” but the fact that 45 blasted Fox News… a network that goes out of their way to make him happy… simply because the channel interviewed a democrat? That seems… mind meltingly bat shit. We know from what he’s demanding of the Republicans (and what Moscow Mitch wants to give him) that Donald Trump would MUCH rather be a dictator… Trump has often lamented the fact that he can’t be “in total control of the media like Putin or Xi”… but for a UNITED STATES PRESIDENT to be flipping out because a news network interviewed a Democrat?? Holy balls, that is some next level Twilight Zone shit!

As for me and my work?

I actually had a whole list of things I wanted to accomplish. And I am done with that list. I’ve accomplished all of that. I mean… I still need to hear back from The Bank (mortgage refinance due to status-change); Insurance Company (verifying eye insurance); and Attorney (following up on Papers to sign). But all the actual work is done. Hooray me. Sort of. Because now I’m left with… well… shall I say… an issue of unfortunate appeal.

For reasons beyond me, my Boss inserted himself into a Juvenile Sex Crime. Fine. Seriously. Cops can bitch about jurisdictional pissing matches all they want. The way I see things? If a more experienced, better funded, more knowledgeable individual or agency wants to take a case- have at it. I’m not ego driven, I’m results driven. So… here’s the story of this case:
Juvenile Sex Case happens.
I interviewed the victim in the presence of her family and a crisis support individual.
Defendant gets a really shitty overly aggressive lawyer. I play the “I’m a nice guy, why are you a bitch” card. My boss hates it. Thinks we should react to bitches like bitches. Takes the case and does the depositions. Case is currently under his ID number and he has had (by far) the most contact with the Defendant, the Victim, and the Defense Attorney. HOWEVER this week, he asked me to prep the case and be ready for trial. Which… would be February 18th. Thing is, though? I already have 7 trials to prepare for February. Not to mention the Magistrate and Juvenile Court Dockets. I mean… I get it. I do. He is NOT doing this to be a dickhole. He’s doing this because we have a LOT of drug cases going on right now so he wants to re-establish the Subject Matter Jurisdiction that we agreed to when I was hired. Kids, Violence, and Sex are my cases. I am Special Victims Unit. I am Rafael Barba. But at the same time? In an office as small as ours, we aren’t best equipped to have lawyers flipping each other cases at the last minute like this. OBVIOUSLY, this is something I need to learn how to do. So I’ll do it. I’ll learn it. I do want to constantly improve at this job, after all. But… I just don’t like a case being taken away from me when it comes down to the REAL investigation only to be returned to me when it is time for the hard part.