Tilfeldige Ord in Book Seven: Reconstruction 2020

  • Jan. 23, 2020, 2:55 p.m.
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No, I don’t speak Norwegian. My mom and brother do. And I still have our family prayer in Norwegian memorized. Thus why I knew that the Norwegian word for “word” was Ord. Tilfeldige is “random” or as close to it as I could find.

So… some things and then other things............

Last night. Positives and Negatives.
Positive: My dad was thrilled to see me.
Negative: That meant that he tried REALLY HARD to get me to stay at their place last night.
Positive: Free food that I didn’t have to cook!
Negative: Watching how my dad’s mental health really has started taking a significant dip. I asked mom about it. Apparently, it is entirely connected to Time of Day. The later in the evening it gets… the less he listens (despite his hearing aids being in), the less he understands, and the less “loving, caring, compassionate guy that he usually is” is there. Honestly makes me worried, truthfully. But he does turn 68 this year. But still… he is too young to start having serious mental issues.

I think part of it, too, is simply his desire to fall into the easy, non-thoughtful embrace of fanatic evangelical Christianity. Like… he watches the local news all the time and sits there openly swearing for the entire hour saying things like “Fucking kill that guy. Abusing a child like that. Animal rights law blocked?! Just hang the abusers. What the fuck is wrong with this world?” Very much a “kill all the people who don’t conform to my views” and then when I mention anything he goes back to “God is justice. Jesus is all that matters.” For example, I did a bit where I was discussing how the Republican Concept of “trust corporations, no regulation needed” is dangerous and stupid but how the Democratic Concept of “trust government, the government is all” is dangerous and stupid. And he celebrated and stated We should all just rally around something. One thing! And I said, “How about National Parks? Clean, safe, beautiful, places of nature.” He agreed. He loves National Parks. He thinks that every human on earth should go camping once a month! And then I mentioned, “So this is why you can’t vote for Donald Trump again. Because he tried to privatize a bunch of those and sell to developers.” And then Dad’s off again; railing about how I clearly just hate Donald Trump and need Jesus in my life and should start going to Church more often because caring about the earthly crap is getting in the way of what really matters. UFDA!

That being said… there was a surprising positive. We were all convinced that LAST YEAR was the final CANADA BOAT TRIP EVER. The Boat Captain grew up with my grandfather. His sons and grandsons don’t want to take over the boat. Captain’s wife died after a long battle with cancer last year. We were all convinced that 2019 would be his swan song and then he’d retire. I didn’t go on that trip because the Hawaii Trip was more important. HOWEVER it appears that there will be an additional trip this year. And I’ve decided… it may take some of my vacation days away from Japan… it may even conflict with my Prosecutors Training Conference… and while it will certainly be difficult being alone on a boat with my dad and brother when only 4 months away from the election… I think it is important that I go. I’m not even that much of a fisherman… but this Boat Trip was important to my Great Grandfather; both of my grandfathers; my godfather/uncle and father; my brother… this Boat Trip has been an important part of my family for 4 generations. I’ve been on it all of one time. Once. Even if this is NOT actually the very last final trip ever of all time?? I think I need to be there.
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In other news… I’ve been listening to the Impeachment Trial. I know, shoot myself in the head. But both as an attorney and a member of the Executive Branch of Government… it is kind of important.
AND ENTIRELY NONPARTISAN REACTION: McConnell and the Republicans are fools and assholes. Donald Trump has illegally refused/blocked all subpoenas across the board. The Senate had the obligation to enforce those subpoenas because SUBPOENAS ARE A COURT ORDER. McConnell had the issue tabled. NO hearing of witnesses outside of the Opening Argument “clips” and NO subpoenas to be issued by the Senate. So just like that, McConnell and the Republican Senate explicitly indicated that despite their Oath of Office to impartially do justice… they had made up their minds and had no interest in even the appearance of an ethical, legal, appropriate trial.
And then comes the evidence. 17 first person accounts. Dozens of meetings and statements. The well established FACT that Donald Trump (1) created an improper back channel to deal with Ukraine in an attempt to get around HIS OWN official channels; (2) Donald Trump used his office to explicitly and directly pressure a foreign official to announce an investigation into a political rival; (3) every government official involved believed that such pressure was “wrong doing” at best and “illegal” at worst; (4) the pressure Donald Trump was using directly threatened the safety of Ukraine (an ally) and the United States; (5) when the official investigation INTO Trump was announced, Donald Trump then (and only then) released the CONGRESSIONAL APPROVED funding to Ukraine; (6) Donald Trump repeatedly and routinely obstructed the investigation into his wrong doing at every turn and is still actively obstructing via refusing to turn over documents that the Senate should already have; (7) Donald Trump is still committing wrong doing by openly attempting to (still) get Ukraine and China to investigate his political opponent.

That is the evidence presented thus far. That isn’t the “opinion of a liberal political strategist”… that is the evidence that has been put on by the prosecution in the Impeachment Trial. And what is the Senate going to do? Vote along party lines. I don’t want to sound hysterical or alarmist but… when that happens, and it absolutely will, it will mark the true death knell of the Republic for me. When our Senators… the very people who owe their duty and allegiance to The Nation, instead put their duty and allegiance to One Man… that’s a dictatorship… that’s a monarchy. The Republic was established with three CO EQUAL branches of government in mind. The President and his office is no more powerful or important than Congress and is no more powerful or important than the Supreme Court. That is how it is supposed to be. But our Congress has officially said, “We defer.” And it should enrage us all.

On this day in 2017: January 17, 2017 I stated the following:
a Facebook promise:
When “Facts” matter; I’ll stop being a rabid Political Poster.
When Cabinet Positions aren’t filled by the likes of Betsy DeVos, I’ll stop being a rabid Political Poster.
When the President obeys the Constitution, I’ll stop being a rabid Political Poster.
When bi-partisan Ethics Committees stop pleading with the President to HAVE ethics, I’ll stop being a rabid Political Poster.
But we don’t live in that world anymore. We live in a world where the President ignores Constitutional Requirements. Where, when an ethics board criticizes the President, he opens an investigation into THEM. Where, when Journalists hold him to a minimum standard, the President threatens them. We live in a country where The President praises Vladamir Putin while belittling US Intelligence. Our President speaks fondly of Duterte, even while the man continues to murder civilians and threaten the United States. So I’ll keep posting political stuff… because Conservative, Liberal, Libertarian, Socialist… this isn’t about Political Parties… this is about holding the office of President to a worthy standard.

Today, I restate that with the following:
I shared this first in 2017. Today is the third day of an impeachment “trial.” The House Managers have presented an abundance of evidence that demonstrates NOT that “The Republican President is bad.” But that TRUMP has continued to behave in a non-Presidential, self-serving, law breaking manner. But we all know how this impeachment trial is going to go. Democrats are being accused of “simply trying to change the election results”. Republicans voted to “prohibit new witnesses and refuse to enforce subpoenas for documents.”
In short… we have 17 first person accounts of wrong doing by the President of the United States. But because “political party” matters more than facts, law, justice, or Country… nobody seems to care. I left the Republican Party because of Mitch McConnell. I registered as a Democrat because of Donald Trump. I am appalled at our government because these two men have continued to bring great shame upon us all as a Nation.

MBFITWW (an attorney) responded as follows:
One thing this all highlights is that the people who wrote the Constitution probably never thought we’d reach a point where one branch of government would willingly give up its ability to check another branch because it’s in their own political interest to do so. We have examples like Graham saying he has already made up his mind before taking an oath that he would be impartial juror. He can do that because the the only real consequence is that maybe, and it’s a real stretch unfortunately, that enough of his constituents would take issue with someone who flagrantly disregards an oath of office.

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In other PISS ME OFF news… my god damned fucking idiotic piss me off Domestic Violence Docket.

A bit of a briefer: Psychologically speaking, many victims of Domestic Violence do not come forward. In addition to that information, many victims who DO come forward will recant shortly thereafter as fear of NOT being with their abuser and fear of BEING WITH the abuser will motivate them to “calm the situation down” by attempting to remove all police and government influence. Worse still, many women who finally break free of domestic violence, enter recovery, and then discuss the psychology of a DV victim will admit that the police and prosecuting attorneys attempted to help many times; but (as part of the process of being a victim), the Victim would actively work against those trying to help her because the psychological conditioning of the abuse had taken such a toll.

This is something I have to deal with often as the Domestic Violence Prosecutor. But I have one case where..... grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Victim calls police to say that she heard her husband loading a gun, threatening to kill her. She flees the house with her children. Police show up. Defendant does not come outside. Backup arrives. Defendant refuses to answer phone and leave the house. Breach Team arrives. Defendant finally calls the Sheriff and agrees to come out. For the next five days, Victim is telling us how afraid of him she is and how she is worried that he will kill her. We get protections in place, no contact orders, everything. Things are quiet for a month.
Month goes by. Since then? Every day 1 phone call, 1 e-mail. From the victim. “Why are you prosecuting this case? Nothing happened! Leave us alone! Why are you trying to break up my family?!
I put up with that for about 3 weeks before I sent the Defense Counsel a “Hey, this is stupid and the whole case is messy. Plead to something and we can get it off the court’s schedule.” I don’t hear a response from Defense for one month. Which means… I’ve now had two months of daily “What is going on with this case?! Why is dismissing this taking so long? Why won’t you people leave us alone!

Finally, today, Defense Counsel got back to me. To say, “We’re going to request a trial.” F.U.C.K.

So now… I have an issue. The press is already all over this case (and my ass) because (apparently) I’m unwilling to properly prosecute Domestic Violence cases. So I can’t just dismiss this case or my Page 2 Roasting might just become Page 1 Roasting and that is exorbitantly bad for this office. So… what happens when “scared for her life” victim becomes “Get out of my life” victim… Defense is unwilling to take accountability for anything… and if I dismiss this case, it might be my job?? Yeah. I’m going to have to get bloody creative and try to find something.

As I always say… I understand the psychology of the victim in these matters… I really do. Honestly. But I am part of a system that requires evidence and testimony. If I don’t have either one of those; I don’t have a case. And I can’t just have “evidence and testimony that suggests something happened”… it can’t just be “establishes a pattern of behavior in the past”… I have to present evidence and testimony that proves beyond a reasonable doubt that something specific and articulable” occurred on a specific date to a specific person. Without that… I’m just telling bedtime stories.
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If I’m going to end the day spouting random tings into the internet word void; here’s one…
Here’s something I’ve been considering. I accept and embrace the criticism I might get from this but… at this point, it is what it is. I’ve been thinking about things I’d want in a girlfriend. Not looks-wise. Obviously, I want to be attracted to the person and I still say anyone that claims you
don’t need to be attracted to a person to date them can shut the fuck up. But the exact definition for what I’m attracted to physically* is still very mutable and inconsistent.
What am I looking for as a person? Someone who is passionate but considerate, strong-minded but flexible, kind but not docile, ambitious but not ruthless, social but not frantic… I want someone that has their own life and may be interested in being part of mine.
But what am I looking for as far as a girlfriend? Honestly… someone to cook with, someone to walk the dog with, someone to talk with and play games with.

Honestly… a dear friend of mine posted on her Facebook that it was her and her husband’s date night and she was so thrilled that he was okay with them just playing Borderlands 3 together instead of hitting the town because (as a nurse) a night in just playing a video game with “the love of her life” was the best thing she could ask for. And I was really happy for her. But at the same time: Oh my Glob! Martha used to pass herself off as semi a gamer. Hell, Halo was referenced in our wedding. BUT LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE after we got married and moved to Omaha… video games died to her along with everything else that she enjoyed or did or was prior to exchanging vows. But honestly… I still don’t think I’m asking for much. Now, not from Martha but from the Universe. Is it so ridiculous to think there may be a woman on this planet that enjoys the same things I do? lol
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If I’m going to end the day spouting random tings into the internet word void; here’s one…
GRANTED… my job puts me in contact with people like this all the time… but they are everywhere and I’m certain people see these people all the time in all sorts of jobs.
The antisocial bastard that takes up four seats on a busy tram and forces the pregnant woman and old gran to stand for a 40 minute train ride just because they can’t be arsed to be a good citizen.
The absolute cunt who bitches about handicapped parking because “cripples shouldn’t be driving anyway.”
The tosser who thinks that the planet is their trash can so why toss your rubbish in a bin.
The Worst of Middle Class Woman taking her every negative emotion out on a customer service representative.
The jerky guys, not quite assaulting women, but clearly making a woman uncomfortable with their presence and comments.

So we all see these people, in varying degrees, all the time. And I’m not going to sit here whinging about them, necessarily, because I do honestly try to do my part in my personal life and in my professional life. But that’s why I want to mention it here at all. How do we come to this? How have we, as a society, come to a place where these creatures are planted, flourish, and continue unabated. And… is there any hope of stopping their continued existence and proliferation? How?
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If I’m going to end the day spouting random tings into the internet word void; here’s one…
I suppose this might be related to the last statement. You see, while I have not personally always done a good job at this… I’ve always wanted to AVOID being one of those creatures that acts in any way disrespectfully to another person. Which, honestly, has NOT helped when it comes to flirting and dating because (and this isn’t a “nice guy incel” thing but an observation) keeping communication as purely respectfully as possible… does not translate to flirtation or come ons.

Treating a person with respect and dignity should be expected of everyone. But a gentleman that holds the door open for everyone, says thank you to everyone, treats everyone with an equal measure of kindness and politeness… I don’t know. I guess I overthink. Because going from “I treat everyone with this level of genuine concern and authentic respect” to “I would like to explore a more meaningful interaction with you” is just… a maneuver I’ve forgotten how to do, if I ever learned it.

Some of these thoughts stem from an interaction yesterday.

I was at the eye doctor and was requesting an additional print out of my Rx so I could get backup lenses. The young woman assisting me was attractive and was not wearing a wedding ring. When I asked her for the print out, she laughed and said “It’s going to cost you.” Then smiled at me again and said, “I’m only teasing.” But after it printed out and she handed it to me, she repeated again “It’s going to cost you.”

Obviously, in a movie script… that would be the point when I would say, “How about I take you to dinner as payment?” It’s cheesy, it plays into her joke, and establishes intention. But life isn’t a movie script and I always stick closely to the tenet Don’t harass a woman at work! So I simply smiled back, politely thanked her for helping me, and left. And then thought about the interaction for the drive back home. Leading to the thought process you read before. This idea of… trying to treat people professionally, with respect, and with legitimate socially-appropriate care and concern.... that’s my default. So I have to say… I really don’t know how to approach someone and say, “You are very attractive and I would like to get to know you better.”
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If I’m going to end the day spouting random tings into the internet word void; here’s one…
Damn. Might have to end the day with bullshit frustration. Can somebody anybody tell me why the Iowan Conservative Voter wants California to be consumed by a black hole? Not just my father… I hear this shit from 3 of the offices in my hallway at work… I hear this shit at the store as I’m buying groceries… I hear this shit in the waiting room as I wait for my therapist.
(1) Nancy Pelosi is the worst most evil creature to ever exist
(2) Homelessness would not exist if it weren’t for California
(3) California is the most godless and amoral place in existence
(4) Nothing California does for the country is worth putting up with it.

WHAT. THE. FUCK?! Guys… you’re Iowans. You live in a state where pigs outnumber people 8 to 1. The coldest this state has ever been is -47F and the hottest this state has ever been is 118F. We are 4th in the nation for obesity. We were 19th in the country in 2019 for Meth Rehab and Hospitalizations. Our 2016 GDP was $157,721,000,000. We have less than 4 million people in the entire state. WHY SO MUCH HATE FOR CALIFORNIA? To some of you… to many of you… you’ve never even BEEN THERE! To the rest… most of you went to “LA” or “San Francisco”… and, I hate to break it to you, but those TWO cities are not indicative of the ENTIRE state! And I get it. I do. This is what happens when Cultural Identity, State Pride, and Political Ideology merge into one hideous beast. California is viewed as progressive, California is viewed as supportive of LGBTQA, California is viewed as self-obsessed with so many TV Shows and Songs about California… Iowans feel neglected, overlooked, ignored… so get angry at the slightly younger sibling (Iowa 1846, California 1850) with a population 10 times the size of yours and a GDP double the size of yours. Because anger, hatred, and vitriol are easy. Self-reflection, personal growth, and determination are hard.
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