[16] NoJoMo 19 in MoMoMo

What is the most hilarious event of your life?

There are so many to choose from. SOOOOOOOOOO many. But, this is supposed to be about learning more about people, yeah?

So, let’s talk about the time my dad taught me how to ride a bike. Now, seriously, looking back, I think this was quite prophetic in a way.

We lived in on a reservation (rez) in Winnebago, Nebraska. There were some little streets that weren’t paved and the little street to my house was one of them.

We lived near a grain bin, so we had all kinds of fun with that.

One spring day, a farmer had left a tire halfway down the “block” from my house. My Dad decided it was time to lose the training wheels.

So, we move to the tire, and he tells me to use it to kick off. So, the first few times were absolute face plants. I don’t think I’ve ever spent a spring so scraped up. But, I was bound and determined to join my older male relatives in riding bikes around town…even down to the BMX track.

So, I spent all this time trying to ride and a few times, I got going decently, but I could never seem to KEEP going.

One summer day, sweat dripping down my face, mixing the dirt and blood, my Mama came out, hollering at my Dad, and she stopped short and just ROARED with laughter. I thought she was laughing at me, so I remember getting mad and shoving off the tire and just GOING. I managed to stay on my bike and keep riding when I came back, hit the curb, and flew over my handlebars.

My Mama was wiping tears from her face while my Dad was telling her to not say anything.

She brings me into the house and tells me its time to put the bike away for the day, so she can wash me up.

My hair was matted to my head, so it took 30 minutes to clean my hair alone. Let me tell you, washing blood out of your hair sucks.

She then told me that tomorrow, I would ride and be able to stay on my bike.

Tomorrow came and I ran outside, grabbing my bike. She told me to get my ass back inside so she could put my hair up. I used to have hair down to mid-thigh, so…not fun.

Anyways, SHE helps me for that day…and TURNED ME AROUND. I was confused, and she told me, “Baby, you’ve been learning how to ride UPHILL.” And she starts laughing again. I was confused, but kicked off…and I rode the rest of the day.

THE NEXT DAY, I took an older bike to ride on the back roads and the fucker broke. The handlebars SEPARATED from the body of the bike and I rode a unicycle for a bit before biting it hard.

So yeah. That’s one of my favorite stories to tell. :D

Last updated January 01, 2020