[07] NoJoMo 19 in MoMoMo

Write about something you are proud to have accomplished.

It would be easy to write about beating cancer twice.

It would be easy to write about leaving an abusive marriage.

Don’t get me wrong, those are INCREDIBLE feats.

My personal accomplishment is overcoming PTSD, in its entirety, and when I make it past this December, it’ll be year five of staying out of the mental health ward.

(Because my son was stillborn and we buried him on Christmas Eve, along with many “bad” things happening in December.)

This is the time of year that my memories present themselves as “two TVs”, meaning that there are times when that’s what it feels like: watching two TVs. One is my current life, the other is a vivid playback of that life. Its complete with the physical memories as well.

But, the PTSD came from being molested by a cousin, being raped by an ex-boyfriend, and thrown down a flight of stairs by my 2nd husband.

It took many years, many different counselors, and trying out a fuckton of medication. But I finally found what works for me. And I am still going to therapy.

But, I am doing so much better. And I am glad that I didn’t let my issues break me. I rose up and took my life back. I wasn’t going to be a little bitch anymore.

So, I won. I wanted to win and I TOOK that win.

I am always surprised with how strong I can be.

Last updated January 01, 2020