I have never been more angry about good news in Second 1st

I put it off. I’m angry. I don’t know how to be not angry about this so I’ll type it out and see if anyone here can say anything of comfort.

Destiny went to court Thursday and it was postponed. We were sure that it honestly had more to do with the fact that it was Gabby’s birthday than anything to do with the lawyer. She left me a message to call her when I got out Friday. When I got out and called she asked me “Best case?” “Best case is your visitation/integration plan is approved and they have some kind of consequence for the google doc crap they pulled” “Well, let me tell you what happened. We never saw the judge.” “My guess is because she’s stupid and it’s postponed again” “LOL let me talk! We went and the lawyers went to the judges chamber and came out in 15 mins.” “What for?” “They came out and my lawyer took me aside to tell me they are terminating the guardianship” And then I went crazy!..... That is GREAT NEWS! BUT it is not what is best for Gabby at all. In fact it’s down right heart breaking. Someone who has told you “You’r mother abandoned you at 1.” “She’s a druggie with a different guy every week” “She takes her kids to the bar so she can get drunk” “She doesn’t care about you”..... now it’s just okay just take her??? Claim you love a child then drop her on a doorstep? There is so much between here and Gabby being home but she’s had 4-5 visits that went very well and you are ready to just drop the child? Gabby hasn’t even spent time with her sister and brother! It’s going to be such a shock.

I’m puzzled. I’m baffled. I’m torn. It’s the end game we want.... but not so quickly? For Gabby. This is not what’s best. It’s going to crush her 13 year old heart. These people have raised her for more than 2/3rds of her life so far. She hasn’t seen her mother.... or her mothers family for 8 years!!!! Suddenly they are going to be telling her when she needs to go to bed and what’s for dinner? .... It’s not right?!?

It’s what we want ultimately but they don’t KNOW each other..... she’s going to move in with strangers.... strangers who love her.... who she will learn .... but it’s going to be much rougher than we would ever want for Everyone. ..... smh I’ve never been more angry about good news. Ever.... in my life.... and I pray I never am again because it’s such a bad confusion. Hard to be happy, just.... worried and scared.... and concerned for all parties. It’s going to take SO MUCH.

They go to court at 1 today to find out in court a timeline for when she will come home. It is possible she will come home after court today!.... I pray not. I Pray that they just speed up the process a bit and we are talking about moving after the first of the year at the earliest. However, it’s possible.... leagally and whatnot.... that she would get moved after court today..... Destiny is physically ready. There is a room at her house with a bed and such things..... plop I love you this is your new home..... OMG how scarey and disorienting .... and.... HOW DARE THEY!