Early Mornings. P.S. I got up 10 minutes early anyway in In My World

I went to bed at midnight last night despite knowing my alarm would be going off at 4:30. I tried everything to get to sleep but by 1:30 I was still awake. I wasn’t even can’t-stay-still restless. Just awake.

I was reading things on tumblr–that usually works. No avail. Protector rolled over in his sleep I was facing away from him and he was on his back so I felt his arm against my back. Warm. It was enough to make my brain static for the moment. I rolled over and put my head above his shoulder and my arms around his.

I finally fell asleep sometime after 1:30 but I slept so lightly that I was dreaming but every time he moved at all I’d wake up. Sometime after 3 I changed my alarm from 4:30 to 4:55. I cant remember my dreams anymore, just that in one time was important and in another it was essentially real life minecraft but less blocky.

I slept well when I did sleep and Protector never moved far from me which was nice.

I’m fucking exhausted. I’m wide awake but my head feels a little like its swimming and a little like I have a too-tight hat on.

Gaslight Anthem is playing and he’s singing along and all is well for the moment.

1) Captain America shield air freshener
Bright street light
Yellow shirt
Glow from my phone
The under pass

2) Head squeezing with slight headache pain
Tears in my eyes from yawning
The low hum of the car
Pressure on my left ankle from my right leg

3) Gaslight Anthem and Protector singing along-I dont know the name of this song (…if I thought it would help I would carve your name into my heart…)
The car engine
That window cracked road going by sound that will always remind me of childhood road trips

4) Stale cigarette smoke-just slightly
Morning air

5) orange juice

I glanced over at Protector who was taking a sip of his orange juice and he hands it to me

“Did you know I was going to ask?”
nod “you know there’s more in the fridge right?”

Little moments.

I’m almost to work and I can feel the hungry nausea and headache setting in. Send help and somewhere to nap 😭

“I love you. Be safe.”
🤙

🙄🙄🙄 ❤

Last updated September 16, 2019