Surveys and Content Stolen from other Prosebox Users in Book Six: Trying to Hold On 2019

It occurred to Pooh and Piglet that they hadn’t heard from Eeyore for several days, so they put on their hats and coats and trotted across the Hundred Acre Wood to Eeyore’s house. Inside the house was Eeyore.

“Hello Eeyore,” said Pooh.

“Hello Pooh. Hello Piglet” said Eeyore, in a Glum sounding voice.

“We just thought we’d check on you,” said Piglet, “because we hadn’t heard from you, and so we wanted to know if you were okay.”

Eeyore was silent for a moment. “Am I okay?” he asked, eventually. “Well, I don’t know, to be honest. Are any of us really okay? That’s what I ask myself. All I can tell you, Pooh and Piglet, is that right now I feel really rather Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All.

Which is why I haven’t bothered you. Because you wouldn’t want to waste your time hanging out with someone who is Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All, would you now.”

Pooh looked and Piglet, and Piglet looked at Pooh, and they both sat down, one on either side of Eeyore in his stick house.

Eeyore looked at them in surprise. “What are you doing?”

“We’re sitting here with you,” said Pooh, “because we are your friends. And true friends don’t care if someone is feeling Sad, or Alone, or Not Much Fun To Be Around At All. True friends are there for you anyway. And so here we are.”

“Oh,” said Eeyore. “Oh.” And the three of them sat there in silence, and while Pooh and Piglet said nothing at all; somehow, almost imperceptibly, Eeyore started to feel a very tiny little bit better.

Because Pooh and Piglet were There.
No more; no less.

Author - AA Milne
Illustration - EH Shepard

Some of you say you just stop reading when you see pictures so I’m assuring you that the pictures attached to these survey answers are clean and simply a fun additional part of the already written answer

What are the first 3 items on your bucket list?
Travel: Japan, London, Ireland

:max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/London-big-Ben-58b5d2663df78cdcd8c69fd4.jpg)

Describe the home of your dreams
A house on a lake with a dock and “cabin boat”. Not a houseboat, but somewhere the Wife and I could go to sleep and hang out if we wanted to. The house itself would be very similar to what we have now. Fenced yard for a dog, bigger kitchen would be a must… hell, I wouldn’t mind re-doing our current house to remove the extra garage space and use that area to create a larger kitchen/dinning room area. And of course… a killer basement for social and cinema and video game possibilities.

Favorite dessert?
Golden Sauce with Chocolate Steamed Pudding. Or ChocoTacos.

Favorite animal?
Domestic: dog, of course. Wild: wolf, dolphin, or elephant. Go ahead, call me biased towards Mammals!

Favorite tree? Why?
Banyan Tree. Seriously, google an image. They are very cool.

Burial or cremation? Why?
Cremation. It amuses me that people think that is anti-Christian faith of me. You’re cool believing in a God that can literally reverse death, take the rotted corpse out of the ground, put your soul back in it, and restore the body to health… but you think that same God can’t just bring my soul to heaven and say “Dude, walk around. No need for corporeal form in my realm, baby!”

Do you feel fulfilled?
In some ways… yeah, actually, a little. I love my family and I live close enough to them to see them if/when I need to. I do have friends, and I can go see them whenever I need to (and if I needed to in a pinch I could). I have a job that pays well and lets me feel like I’m contributing to the world in some small insignificant way. Really my only issue is that I wish that my marriage involved a fulfilling emotional and physical component. Which, for anxious attachment, is my world but from a healthier perspective… is just a fucked up portion of an important part of my world as a whole.

Name three hobbies
Video Games, Writing, and Anime

What is your greatest passion?
Beauty. Beauty and trying to make the world a better place.

Favorite color?
Green. Purple. Red. Black. Yellow.

Coffee or tea?
If I’m drinking coffee, that shit better have milk, sugar, cream, ice cream, whipped cream, and caramel flavoring! Tea is almost always preferred.

Bike, car, bus, train, plane or boat?
I haven’t been on a bicycle since before High School. I’m in Iowa so car rides tend to be the primary mode of transportation. Buses and Trains just… aren’t available for the most part in this state. After my recent flight, I’m learning that my fibromyalgia is not a fan of plane travel. And boats? MAN do I love the water! I could sleep on a boat for the rest of my life and be happy!

E-books or hard copy books?
Hard Copies all the way. I try to read digital and… I can just feel my brain disengage! If I don’t have multiple senses engaged in the book itself… my mind wanders away from me!
/arc-anglerfish-arc2-prod-tronc.s3.amazonaws.com/public/TTGQWMWKWAF6XOCFEBSS6UJF3U.jpg)

How many hours on average do you sleep?
Typically, it isn’t pretty. On average, I get in bed around 10. Then I drift off sometime between 11 and 1. Then I’ll either get up at 2 or 4. Go back to sleep, then wake up at 6 or 7 to go to work. So at best I get 7 hours of sleep with a 1 interruption. Usually it is more of 2 hours of sleep, an interruption, two hours of sleep, then sitting in my bed for an hour.

Best season?
Autumn. It isn’t the Midwest Winter of Snow and Blow. It isn’t the Midwest Summer of Air You Wear. It isn’t the Midwest Spring of Rain & 2nd Winter. Autumn is cooler weather, prettier trees, and a sense of new life as schools start back up state-wide.

Preferred genre for TV viewing?
I like Sci Fi, Thrillers, thought provoking dramas, unique comedies, and most cartoons

If your power went off, phone was dead and no wifi…..how would you spend an evening at home?
Sleeping, playing with the dog, reading by candlelight, checking on neighbors

What do you talk about when with good friends?
Typically life, politics, and entertainment

Box games or electronic ones?
Yes please, lol. I still play tabletop games and I’m an avid video game player

How many houseplants do you have inside?
We kill our houseplants. Though, I’m surprised to see how excited Wife has become to have outdoor plants. Many days, I see her outside taking pictures of the plants or pruning or weeding.

What’s your favorite Thanksgiving food?
Normally, I’d say mashed potatoes and gravy or stuffing. But we’re getting to that time of year when Thanksgiving has so been just far enough away that all I can focus on for TDay food is that Onion/Cheese thing Mom makes.

Do you like Techno music?
I do. But I was having a conversation with Wife just last night when I said “I like EDM” and she asked, “You mean techno?” Techno is a genre within EDM. I also like trance, chill, lofi, electro-swing… EDM. lol

Isn’t it annoying when skinny girls say they’re fat?
It annoys me whenever people say they are fat. I have a friend that is genuinely VERY obese. But he’s working on his HEALTH and that’s more important. Will he lose weight as he works on his health? Probably. But his genetics are fucked. His father is massively obese and his mother is pretty bad, too. So if he can’t remove his gut but he isn’t struggling for breath after walking up to his apartment? GOOD! That is what should be focused on.

Have you ever been drunk?
I have. I have been belligerent drunk, fall down drunk, black out drunk.

What size jeans do you wear?
I wear a size 42. Here is where life and history can really fuck with someone. I was a size 20 in jeans for a fucking DECADE. When I went from a 20 to a 36 in 4 years; I freaked the fuck out. That is 16 inches in circumference in 4 years! That’s 4 inches a year!! Of course… I was growing into my “adult body” and had started taking medication for my crippling chronic pain… which likely played a part in all of that. Wife met me when I was transitioning in all of that; she met me at about 32 inch waist. So now that I’ve added 10 inches to that… yeah. She has a problem NOT focusing on my gut. And it is worse for me because to me… it wasn’t 10 inches in 5 years… it was 22 inches in 10 years. NOT happy.

When’s the last time you ate Skittles?
It has been many years

Who did you last say I love you to?
My Wife last night. I told her specifically this week had been really rough and that I was trying not to be as “Anxious Attachment” but that I still was feeling all sorts of dark and depression and tired from work so I really needed some hugs and emotional support.

Is your second toe longer than your big toe?
It is significantly longer

Do you think cinnamon toothpaste is disgusting?
I don’t often use it but would not consider it disgusting

What kind of car does your mom drive?
I think either some kind of Honda CRV or Lexus CRV

What’s a word that rhymes with “tower”?
Cower; it is a good woody word that can be used with other nice words like petrified

What was the last song you downloaded?
Down… loaded? I…? Yeah. I’m 35 but in some ways I’m 65. I never really got onto the whole IPod thing.

Is it annoying when people say “like” too much in conversations?
I went to Valley High School. I am a Valley guy. Ergo, I was surrounded by Valley Girls. YES IT ANNOYS ME

How old will you be in five years?
I’ll have been 40 for 3 months. Which is kind of funny since my wife is turning 40 next year.

Where were you at midnight last night?
In bed

Have you ever seen the show Paris Hilton’s My New BFF?
No, thank CHRIST! I find her and the entire brand of “I’m rich and I’m powerful but why aren’t I more famous?” entertainment to be vapid and mind-offending horse shit

Have you ever truly been in love with someone?
I can say yes confidently. Three times.

Spell the name of the street you live on without vowels:
Frst Drv

Do you like Beyonce’s new song “If I Were a Boy”?
I haven’t heard the real version of it. I tend to listen to a lot of parody songs. May I interest you in “If I Were a Core?”

When’s the last time you exercised?
I took Nala for an hour’s walk on Wednesday but the last time we went to the GYM was before Hawaii

Do you shop at Victoria’s Secret?
No. Obviously, I’d love to. I would love to buy my wife SOME kind of clothing that has a higher price tag and/or quality. But she is VERY frugal and is very genuinely the type of girl that says “If I’m spending more than 30 dollars on bras, it better be a combo pack!”

What brand deodorant do you use?
Dove. I have really sensitive skin and many different deodorants give me a rash.

Do you say Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays?
This is a non-issue that has become a fucking rallying cry of stupidity in my community. When I’m with FAMILY I’ll say “Merry Christmas” because I know what they are all celebrating. Otherwise, I’ll say Happy Holidays because I genuinely want to be inclusive… not as “liberal propaganda” but because I think intentionally not being a dickhole isn’t a Political Statement so much as it is a Community Statement.

In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a guy?
Depends on how you mean “hang out with a guy” but I might be meeting MBFITWW in Pandora to screw around in Borderlands 2 together.

Do you believe everything happens for a reason?
I used to. I used to very sincerely! But not anymore. Instead I think “All things can be worked towards good” but I don’t think they happen FOR a reason.

Have you ever been a gymnast or a cheerleader?
I was a gymnast briefly when I was 5. And a dancer. And an actor. And a singer. No wonder everyone thought I was gay… this is Iowa in the 1990s and I’m doing all that!

Where do you wish you were right now?
Realistically? I wish I were at home, with my Wife resting next to me, the puppy curled up in a Puppy Donut, and me playing a video game.
Ideally? I wish I were in an All Inclusive Resort with my Wife wearing something sexy about to have passionate mind-altering sex.

Do you think high school relationships can last?
Ask my parents! They started dating in High School, got married in 1976 and are still married to this day!

Does anyone have feelings for you right now?
I can confidently say yes. I’m only semi-confident about my Wife but I can still say confidently because I know of many people that have feelings for me. Whether those feelings are familiar love, lust, loathing, or apprehension… those are all feelings.

Have you ever liked someone older than you?
Many times. In fact, my Wife is the oldest one out of me, my brother, and SIL.

Are you unsure about your feelings for someone?
Always. Be it medication, self-awareness, self-doubt, or whatever… I’m always analyzing my emotions to make sure (1) Are these really my emotions or someone else’s I’m accepting as mine? (2) Are these healthy emotions or are these the kind of emotions that lead to things like Aku? (3) Am I seeing things clearly and responding with proper emotion; or am I missing something and reacting inappropriately because I don’t have enough information?

Who are you going to be with Saturday night?
“Same thing we do every night, Pinky.” Every Saturday night is spent with Wife. And every Saturday Night is spent with Wife watching the TV (often Animal Planet or Toonami).

When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
Last night! Thankfully!!

Do you have alcohol in your house?
We have a bottle of wine in our house. Later tonight, we will have a bottle of whiskey in the house.

Has someone smacked your butt in the past week?
My wife does this sometimes to get me out of the way.

Are you ever affected by coffee?:
Yes in that it makes me poop

What’s one thing about you people wouldn’t expect?
It always depends on who you ask. I’m sure my friends would be flabbergasted to see me in trial being such a serious and persuasive person; I’m sure my coworkers would be horrified at how silly and goofball I am in my day to day life.

Have you ever had a crush on someone “too young” for you?
Too Young means something specific to me. For instance, as I frequent “Red Head” Pintrest pages, Pintrest keeps saying “Look at Francesca Capaldi, isn’t she sexy?” And I’m like STOP IT RIGHT NOW! SHE’S 15! THAT IS NOT OKAY! But I have had a crush on someone who was around 24 years old when I was around 30… and that did feel like having a crush on someone “too young” for me.

Do you shave your legs more than once a week?
I haven’t shaved my legs since I was in High School Swimming.

Do you still have your V-card?
I exchanged it in 2005

Are you tanned?
No. Even after the Hawaii trip, I’m a pasty white ghostly thing!

Would you get married if you could right now?
I am already married. If that fell apart and someone came along that was supportive, wealthy, attractive, and had a libido… I’d certainly consider it!

What is your favorite type of jewelry (i.e. bracelets, necklaces, etc.)?
I like necklaces even if I don’t wear jewelry EVER (except for my wedding ring)

Would you go 2 days without eating for $200?
I’m pretty sure I’ve done that for free so… yes please, I would like to be paid for that.

What are your plans for the future?
Hopefully… if I’m really lucky, really blessed, and work really hard.... stay at this job, stay married, stay at my house.

The last person you had a thing with comes up to you and says “I’m sorry”?
Already happened. Technically, it would be Thompson and we already reconciled and allowed each other to “disappear without hard feelings.”

Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner?
I’ve tried several times over the last few years but… I hardly consider it a romantic dinner when your partner is buried in her phone throughout most of it. So, I’d have to say the last honestly romantic dinner we’ve had was Thanksgiving 2011.

Thanksgiving 2011; our first Thanksgiving as a married couple, our first Thanksgiving in Omaha

Do you regret losing your virginity to who you lost it to?
That is an interesting and difficult question to answer. Because kind of yes, kind of no. It would have been nice to have had an actual sex life.... particularly, it would have been nice to bed Aoife and Shanon, if not also Snead and Wicca. But then, if I hadn’t waited until the woman I wanted to marry… I would be a much different person. SO… it’s like a Chose Your Own Adventure Dilemma. If I could read ahead to know how each different choice ended, it would have made the whole thing a lot easier, lol.

How is your love life going for you right now?
You’re all privy. LoL. “Love Life” may mean two things. My Love Life ie: Romantic, Sexual is abysmal. My Love Life ie: my marriage is… rocky… but with some small glimmers of hope.

What do your parents really think of you?
My Dad is proud of me, but confused as hell at why I make the choices I do.
My Mom is thrilled to see the man I’ve become but wishes I wasn’t as much like her and Dad’s negative parts.

If your boyfriend ever hit you, would you dump him?
Yes, probably. I left Aku because she got violent. Now, it IS true that Wife has expressed herself through violence before… like slapping my arm, or backhanding my back. But if she ever closed-fisted hit me or used violence with the intent to cause damage- hell yes.

What are you doing tomorrow?
Shopping for Chairs, walking the dog… not much.

Does the thought of marriage scare you?
No. I assume in large part due to my programming (but also my attachment style) I always wanted to get married.

Do you think you’ll be married in 10 years?
I honestly can’t say. I really do hope so. It would be REALLY nice not to get divorced. But there really, truly, strongly are things that need to change. I’m not going to be the Piggy Bank Husband. If I’m married, I want a relationship with my wife. One that includes physical intimacy on some level.

Have you ever cleaned up someone else’s vomit?
Yes. Room Mates a few times. Wife’s even more times than that.

Have you ever felt like you were being crushed by an invisible weight?:
Yeah… you mean anxiety and pressure… YEAH

Have you ever looked back and realized that it’s been ages since you cried?:
Occasionally. I honestly think this is the longest I’ve gone since full on crying… but that has a lot to do with getting to the point in my marriage where I’m not sad or sorrowful just… upset and matter of fact.

Do you ever wish you could go back to kindergarten?:
Like… if I could go back to Kindergarten via “Future Gadget Lab Project 8: Phone Wave Real Name TBD” and re-do 1990 to present… you bet your ass!

Would you rather spend your whole life in the light, or in the dark?:
Are we talking literal or metaphorical… because I think I could adapt to darkness faster than I could adapt to constant light

Do you have a good luck charm?:
No, I do not.

Has anyone ever sang to you, just for you?:
Yes. It was beautiful. Granted… it was the start to a really fucked up, strange relationship but yes.

What’s the longest phone conversation you’ve ever had?:
Probably some hours and hours conversation with Long Distance Girlfriend when I was in college.

Is there anyone that you have trouble saying goodbye to?:
Not really. I only ever have trouble saying goodbye to people in a Hospice setting.

Do your friends like the person you’re dating/crushing on?:
I.... think so? I believe that they would be sad if we split up.

Do you care if your parents approve of the people you date?:
Yes. The people I date are expected to be “potential family members” and life was pretty tough when (especially my father) didn’t like who I was dating

If asked to pick a number between one and five, what number would you pick?:
2

Do you use Skype to talk to your friends?:
Nope. I’m really behind and shitty with technology. I mean, I’m sure I could use skype… I’ve had it downloaded before and used it when I was in Tiny Town… but that just isn’t something I do anymore.

In your opinion is calling easier than texting?:
Sometimes. Almost nobody calls my cell anymore, preferring text but I hate texting on a cell phone and would far rather message via computer keyboard

Name all the people you’ve hugged today:
I’ve not hugged anyone today. Not even Nala, pet her though.

Is there anything that you want to say right now to someone?:
So much to so many people! But primarily: to all the people of all the world… go one day without anger, choosing instead to try to understand everyone you see. Sure, many people in this world suck… but anger doesn’t fix the problem. If we wanted to work towards SOLUTIONS, we can. But solutions don’t come about from anger in most cases. Because anger requires the immediate solve, destruction, total tear down. There are smarter, better, and healthier ways to create a better world.

If you married the last person you texted, what would your last name be?:
The last person I texted was my brother, so my last name would not change.

About how many times a day do you use the backspace button?:
As rarely as possible, but FAR more than I’d like to. I’m a very fast typer and far too often as I’m typing, I’ll catch a letter that I didn’t hit hard enough or accidentally skipped and I’ll hit backspace, fix it and move on. For example, that last sentence required 7 backspace hits!

Are you allergic to any animals?:
Not that I am aware of

Do you know anyone who smokes?:
Yes. It seems that most of Omaha smoked and it wouldn’t be Rural Iowa with lots of smoking

Do you usually spend your weekends out, or at home?:
Almost always at home; even if we’re “out” because “out” means at my parents’ place usually

Do you miss anyone right now?:
Not really, but yes. It is more of a “I wish they were still in my life” feeling but not like a “I miss them right now” feeling.

How far away is your next birthday?:
10 Months

Have you ever felt completely lost?:
Too often!!

What’s the stupidest question anyone could ever ask you?:
“Do you even KNOW what the Constitution says about (insert rural Iowa issue that they think Fox News educated them about)?!”

Do you think it’s wrong for people to say ‘retard/retarded’ as an insult?:
I do, but I also think we should show compassion and understanding for people who use it in a seemingly “proper” sense. Retard and Retardation means slow or slow of thought. I don’t believe we should use it as a pejorative and I do believe “mentally challenged” is a more appropriate way of describing an individual who is mentally challenged. However, if (for example) someone says, “I was so upset when the doctor told me my child was retarded” I’m not going to jump on them because THAT IS ACTUALLY WHAT DOCTORS WOULD TELL PEOPLE up to a certain point in time. So, yeah. Modernity, it is okay to be specific. I have a cousin with Down Syndrome… he’s not “retarded” he has Down Syndrome… but the 65 year old woman talking about her own child? Maybe I don’t jump down her throat

What swear word do you use most often?:
Cock, Bloody, Hell, Damn, Fuck, Shit

Have you ever had to go to the police department?:
I’m a prosecuting attorney… so yeah… it is part of my job

Have you ever lived through a hurricane?:
No, it is one of the few Natural Disaster Storms that I have not been in yet

Have you ever wished you could disappear?:
This requires additional detail. Are we talking “Disappear into the void” or “Disappear from one place and time and show up many years later in Cabo” or is this simply “turn invisible”

Can you name all the candidates in the previous presidential election?:
No, if we’re also including the Republican Primary candidates. I can do a damn good job, but I know I’d forget someone!

Do you eat organic foods?:
Not intentionally but if offered, I won’t say no

Have you ever had a home grown tomato?:
I honestly have no idea

Have you ever held a real gun?:
Yes, I have gone and shot many guns many times in many different environments

Would you rather wear Converse or Vans?:
I… honestly didn’t know there was that big of a difference. It would depend on my outfit. Tenth Doctor wore Converse but Dwight McCarthy wore Vans

Is there a song that reminds you of someone?:
There are many songs that remind me of many people

Have you ever been called bipolar?:
Yes, many times in High School

Do you think Facebook can be safe if you’re smart about what you post?:
Define safe. Do I believe that our individual data is safe anywhere— no. Not at all. I believe that as long as there is profit to collect people’s data and sell it without their knowledge, everyone who CAN WILL.

Have you ever made fun of a handicapped person?:
Depends on how you determine it. I was in scouts with an individual who was mentally disabled. He was also an asshole who knew how to get out of trouble. He could be mostly fine (if a little slow) but as soon as he’d start grabbing (molesting) a classmate or masturbating in the girl’s lavatories; he and his parents would fall on the sword of “Mentally Challenged.” And yes, I had no qualms making fun of him.

Do you think it’s okay to have sex before marriage?:
Not anymore!

Have you ever liked a book that you had to read for school?:
I’ve enjoyed many. I’ve hated many, too, so that balances.

Do you have any mosquito bites?:
YES those little bastards are voracious and apparently, they are ALWAYS bad in our city!

Have you pulled an all-nighter in the last week?:
I have not. If I had proper motivation, I could easily intentionally do one for video games or anime… but the truth is, I sometimes do all nighters UNintentionally because of my pain and/or anxiety. There are times when I just.... honestly can’t sleep no matter what I do! GLAD I haven’t had that happen in the last week!

And… I’ll end with HUMOR ONLY because these few memes made me laugh