SoOoO Much to Say Part 3 in Book Six: Trying to Hold On 2019

Alright y’all… between the Memorial Day Weekend and Work keeping me busy… this is kind of all being done at once. SO… I separated it out into various portions to hopefully make it easier to read. The best way to read this is Chronologically so… in the following order.

SoOoO Much to Say Part 1
SoOoO Much to Say Part 2
SoOoO Much to Say Part 3
SoOoO Much to Say Part 4
SoOoO Much to Say Part 5
SoOoO Much to Say Part 6
SoOoO Much to Say Part 7

BEGIN Part Three

The rest of Sunday was pretty uneventful for the most part. Friend and I in the basement watching Golden Kamuy. Wife upstairs watching YouTube and Horror Movies with the dog. Around 5-ish, I decide that none of us have eaten much today and it is a good time to start grilling. An important part of the weekend. MBFITWW has a lot of experience with both Gas and Charcoal grills. My only experience is with Charcoal but the grill we currently have is Gas. So it was great to have him there helping me understand the primary practical differences in all of that. Then again, though? Nala is outside enjoying the day. Friend and I are outside grilling. Wife? On the couch indoors. Does not come outside to shoot the shit, check out the grill, or engage in any way. It just… it really felt like an intentional and willful distance.

During dinner, MBFITWW is drinking his whiskey and Wife and I have paired the pork with a Cabernet Savignon. The whole time, I’m trying to probe Wife for what kind of thing would she be in the mood for? Pretty much: What do MBFITWW and I need to watch to make you want to join us?! Finally, MBFITWW offers a suggestion. He knows Wife loves everything British. He knows she likes Historical Fiction. He knows that she’s into sci fi and fantasy if there are dire stakes and serious matters being discussed in that lens. So he suggests The Ancient Magus Bride. All of us, including the dog, head downstairs.

According to Wikipedia, The Ancient Magus Bride: Having been ostracized by both her relatives and partially by society, orphaned high school student Chise Hatori decides to sell herself at an auction in order for somebody else to take her in and have a new place to call home. At the auction in London, she is sold for five million pounds to Elias Ainsworth, a seven-foot-tall humanoid with an animal skull for a head. This magus, who seems closer to demon than human, will either bring her the light she desperately seeks or drown her in ever deeper shadows in her new country, Britain.

We start the first episode and I can tell Wife is already looking for a way to excuse herself. GR. During the second episode, Nala (who has been somewhat shoved off the couch entirely due to her hyperactivity and biting) squats in front of MBFITWW’s seat and starts peeing. I react and grab her, take her upstairs, send her outside, bring the cleaning implements back down and Wife and I clean the pee spot. I go back upstairs and let the dog back in. Nala races back downstairs and I can hear her running around. I pour another glass of wine and bring the bottle down to the basement. Wife does not wish for a refill and I place the bottle (actually Bota Box) on the wetbar.

We watch the second episode, Nala still bouncing around and being a freak. I finish my wine and rise to get a third glass. After I pour it, Wife starts yelling at me. She picks up the dog and starts yelling that, since I had a 3rd Drink, she refuses to be in the basement with us anymore as I was drinking far too much. And goes upstairs and shuts the door to the basement area. suppressed angry sigh.

We stop the DVD and kind of just sit there thinking, “Now what?” As MBFITWW starts up the series Baccano!, I get a text message from my wife. My wife… who is upstairs… having just suddenly freaked out and left… texted me saying, “I’m glad I came up for Nala’s sake. She finally settled down and is napping.” I was… still very upset. VERY upset. This was Sunday Night. We’ve had a guest in our home since Friday Afternoon. Other than when we eat, the only time you’ve spent with him or me at all was when we sat upstairs and watched the Horror Movie you picked out. I was very upset. So I texted back, “Good. Good for Nala. Though I still maintain that an ultimatum that isn’t expressed is bullshit. I had no idea that my actions would mean you would leave and had I known, I would not have done that. I want you to be part of the weekend. What kind of asshole do you think I am that I would want a whole weekend without my Wife involved?” As I said… upset.

In fact, I was so upset that I could hardly concentrate on the Anime. Which is unfortunate as Baccano! could be really good. As another Historical Fiction one, it could also be one that Wife would have enjoyed as well. But as I said, I was so upset that I could barely concentrate on the Anime. I was so upset that I stopped concentrating on anything. Just… stewing in my emotions and drinking wine. Until I fell asleep on the couch in the basement (because I wasn’t going to go back upstairs and sleep in the bed with a wife who clearly wanted nothing to do with me or our guest.)

This creates some interesting scenarios. First, it finally gets the guest to sleep on a bed. Since I was asleep on the couch, he would be required to use one of the two guest rooms we set up with him in mind. Second, it meant that I was sleeping without my CPAP so none of the sleep was restful. Third, it meant I woke up an hour before anybody else and could finally play video games. It was Monday morning, I hadn’t played video games since the previous Wednesday or Thursday. That in itself isn’t “such a big deal” but something to throw out there. My wife, who gets upset every time I play video games, had spent most of her weekend playing cell phone games and watching television… the way she spends a lot of her every day… this was the first video game time I’d had in many days… but I’m the bad guy for playing video games. AND GET THIS… MBFITWW woke up, left the basement guest room (letting me know which one he had used), used the bathroom, then came over and watched me play the game. Y’know, the thing I keep telling Wife that she can do. He just sat and watched me play for a while before going back to the bedroom and going back to sleep!!

After everyone had woken up, Wife and I cooked us all breakfast. And then had an awkward morning. Because I was going to try REALLY FUCKING HARD to include Wife in something. SHE (apparently) was going to try REALLY FUCKING HARD to ignore it all. So she just sat on the couch… watching TV… and MBFITWW and I kind of just… sat… doing nothing. Finally, I apologized to my friend and said, “I’m sorry if this is rude, but as I didn’t have my CPAP downstairs, I feel awful. Would it be too offensive if I grabbed a quick nap with the CPAP?” He said it was fine. I used Wife’s phone to set an alarm and went to bed. As Nala saw me adjusting the CPAP mask, she raced into the bedroom and started doing her “begging to come on the bed” dance. I figured “What the hell” and lifted her up. Next thing I know, Wife is gently shaking me to tell me that the alarm just went off. I awake and Nala is exactly where she was when I fell asleep. Curled up tightly, leaning all of her body weight onto me. At least one of the women in my life likes to cuddle.

My wife was still on the couch. Still watching Zombie Movies including Train to Busan which is one I’ve been wanting to see. I go downstairs and thank my friend for letting me take that much needed nap. He shrugs. He actually had a bunch of stuff he was catching up on so it worked out. Then he selected something that he knew would be quick(ish) so that we could finish the whole series before he hit the road to go home. It was Zombie Land Saga. Maybe not something I would have chosen myself but it was really good. Well written, silly in some places, relatable characters. The Wikipedia Synopsis: In the year 2008, high school girl Sakura Minamoto is abruptly killed in a traffic accident while heading to school. 10 years later, Sakura, along with six “legendary” girls from various eras of Japan’s history, are brought back as zombies by a man named Kotaro Tatsumi, who seeks to save Saga Prefecture by putting together an all-zombie idol group known as Franchouchou.

My friend leaves and at this point it is around 8 or so on Monday Night. I really wanted to get the Hawaii Flights booked before the end of the weekend to make sure it was taken care of, so I ask Nancy to help out. As she is on her tablet and I am on my phone looking at flights and other options… Wife keeps complaining about how expensive all of the flights are. I remind her that my parents are covering the cost of flights but it doesn’t seem to matter. She just gets more and more agitated that it is hard to find something for under $1,000 per person. She starts trying to do things as convoluted and unnecessarily difficult as possible. What if we fly Delta from Des Moines to Denver then United from Denver to LAX then American Airlines from LAX to Kona than drive Kona to Hilo? To which… no. We’re looking at a minimum 12 hour trip, not counting layovers. MORE complicated is not what we want. But she’s still freaking out and trying to figure out how to do it “the cheapest way.” Meanwhile, I’ve already got a fairly good trip planned. The one I’ve developed is ONE airline the WHOLE trip, ONE layover (that is over an hour to provide coverage but shorter than 2 hours to avoid wasting time) that gets us TO and FROM the correct places (Des Moines, Hilo) on the correct days Tuesday/Thursday. Before affirming anything, I ask about Rental Cars. The cheapest deal looks to be about $400 for the week. So I have an easy, decent, convenient round trip with rental car… for a total cost of $2,850.00. Wife. Hits. The Roof. Huge blowup bullshit frustrating argument due to PRICE. Need I remind you: The flight is being paid for. So… literally, she’s having this damned blowup argument over the excessive price of FREE!

Meanwhile, as she’s arguing about how my plan is FAR TOO EXPENSIVE, she’s getting herself frustrated and bent out of shape trying to develop and create more plans more in her fashion. Like… okay, if we take 5 different flights and have a 19 hour trip then there is a really cheap rental car place about 5 miles from the airport, so if we can find a shuttle or get a cab out to that place… and it’s like STOP IT. Stop trying to make us work seven times as hard to save thirteen dollars on a rental car!! What. The. Hell?! But… I actually do know what the hell. She is just setting herself up to do things exactly as she always does:
Step 1: Say that we need to things her way!
Step 2: Her way becomes over complicated, convoluted, and begins to frustrate her and stress her out.
Step 3: The stress of trying to develop “her way” turns into a full blown freak out and she becomes miserable
Step 4: Eventually, she yells at me to “JUST DO IT YOUR WAY!”
Thus, I end up “getting my way” but she gets to be pissy and angry and frustrated about me getting my way. This also serves to position her in such a way that, if my way does fail or develop problems, she can hold herself as better stating, “This wouldn’t have happened if we’d done it my way!”

Ultimately… I said fuck it. MY parents are paying for the flights so that WE can go to MY GODFATHER’S vacation home. If my parents think that what I selected is excessive, they’ll let us know and we can offer to cover part or all of the trip. And as far as I know… that wouldn’t be a problem! Wife doesn’t buy a whole lot of things, I don’t buy a whole lot of things, we’ve got two healthy bank accounts. Unless Wife has opened up a hidden credit card or some shit… we’re financially okay!! So I bought my plan. And sure… if it ROYALLY fucks up, I’m going to feel terrible. But I’d rather have things taken care of, thoughtfully planned, and purchased… as opposed to sitting there planning for the next three weeks, freaking out and trying to buy Last Minute Flights because Wife couldn’t make a bloody decision.