Dreaming in Current Events

At the beginning of last year, I decided that I wanted to create a new Instagram account. I wanted to take it a little more seriously than it ever needed to be. I had a rough idea about what I wanted the content to be and I even did research on how to grow my account. I actually put a lot of energy into that account but it failed to grow. Miserably. I was not brave enough to be more creative. To go out and take better shots. To be a little more vulnerable. I still have this fantasy in my head about becoming a social media influencer. I know it’s stupid but I wanted to create a YouTube channel featuring my cooking. I had other ideas for content also. I want a health and wellness channel that doesn’t take everything so seriously. I’m not exactly aiming to win an Instagrammy or anything but it is just a small dream that I have. I kind of want to follow in the footsteps of Sadia’s Pick Up Limes channel. With my own spin of course. She’s so awesome and I’m a stan.

I am aiming to get a degree in nutrition, yes. I want to become a licensed dietician, yes. Do I know 100% of what I am getting into with that? No, but I do know that when I meet a new client or patient my biggest challenge will be getting them to want to change. I want to open a wellness centre or clinic or channel or something that offers more than just nutritional advice. I want to create an environment that inspires change so people can enter that journey with an open mind. To create a community with like-minded individuals who all have the same goals that can get support when they need it. I don’t have that all planned out just yet but that is just some of the bigger picture. I had not put that thought out into the universe yet so boom.

I have other small dreams, one of which is to write a couple of successful novels. Fictions of course. If I went and took some workshops or courses I would be confident enough to get that started. I have those stories in my mind and I know that they’ll be epic, I just don’t have the self-esteem to get them out. I want to travel and vlog those as well. FOMO is the best way that I can describe myself in 2018. Since the beginning of this year, I have been saying that my thoughts have been manifesting in mysterious ways. The cosmos has been removing so many obstacles and I am not much of a believer in this stuff but I can’t deny or ignore it. I just need to meet it halfway. I am that person who is struggling to make changes right now. I’ve written almost every day since I lost my job a month ago. Every entry is the same thing. Me struggling to get up the nerve to face my future and fight for it. I’m so over myself right now.

Last updated May 26, 2019