Mother's Day- and an unpopular opinion in Journal

This isn’t a justification; it’s just how I feel.

Saturday DH had a short discussion about Mother’s day plans. I told him my plans- which had to be completed by 11am and couldn’t be moved- and suggested to spend the afternoon with his mother. He suggested going to brunch with his mom and paternal grandmother. I just said, as long as we get all the other stuff done by 11am; its fine. Oh by the way, he mentions, brunch is at 930 am about an hour from our house. Okay, said I, as long we do (list ensues) before 11am.
Mother’s day morning arrives and he’s asking, are you going to brunch? at 830am. I reply, well no, we’ve got to get to get this stuff done before 11am. He gets mad and sad and plops down. ‘you could have just told me you didn’t want to go.’ he complained.
Okay. I never said I didn’t want to go. I merely laid out the reality that IF we had any chance to make this plan a reality, we have get this stuff done early. He didn’t wake up early or attempt to do anything to facilitate these plans… so… who’s to blame here?

Sure, I feel slightly bad for DH, but can’t help reality. Ya snooze ya looze, right?

I’m still in a bit of shock over my recent break through (down?), over my childhood. I continue to place bits of myself on this map of sad broken psychology; things that were previously strewn about with no rhyme or reason. And on a day like Mother’s day of all things, I came to understand the blackmailing of children; the hard truth that mother’s love is in fact the most conditional love of all.

It’s quite odd, don’t you think, that we are expected to venerate someone simply for fulfilling a voluntary station?
We seem to treat it like it’s some great self sacrificial deed; to have a child. When it was merely a voluntary choice; a fulfillment of personal decision; a responsibility willingly accepted.
In fact, it is the child that should be appreciated and adulated. The child that had no choice in the matter; an unwilling pawn who may or may not have had the luck of being born to fit parents. And for those who are without luck? At least they have a shot at life, right?
Parents, even of grown children, still bear the onus of going to the child to continue a relationship. In my opinion, a parent always bears the responsibility of contributing value to their child’s life. At the point of mutual free will, grown children can and often do reject any such relationship with parents when no value is offered.
There is social pressure, however, put onto grown children that they must continue to venerate and put emotional or other resources into a continued relationship with their parents. Case in point; mother’s day. Whyfor? For completing a duty that even the basest animals are capable of? Surely any self respecting human being cannot receive praise for something that even a rat does adequately.
Yet parents do.
I would argue that the only people who accept this praise without any misgivings are sociopathic.

There does seem to me to be a fundamental assumption at the heart of this problem; and that is that life is good. I’m not in disagreement with this basic premise, but it is a truly grievous error to conflate a premise as basic and general as ‘life is good’ with the mother in the particular. This is a very basic logical fallacy, but one that seems to be so prevalent in today’s society that it goes completely or virtually unopposed, and unexamined.