disappointed in Torridaussity Two

  • Feb. 25, 2014, 1:57 a.m.
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  • Public

I really need to stop believing in people who don't deserve it. As one of my readers told me I can't let others define my self worth or bring me down and lately that is all I am letting happen to me. I say I let it happen as I have control over myself and I have let myself lose control of my self worth and that it isn't dependent upon how others think of me or whether they appreciate me. My "friend" that I mentioned a few entries ago that hurt me, then apologized has disappointed me again and he probably has no idea he has done it because it is my fault for expecting the best I know he has in him, but receiving his half assedness. You see he is being deployed and before the incident happened I was planning on writing a letter to him and sending him some pictures he had asked for awhile ago. I am doing a one month to live challenge and it talks about making sure you let those you care about, know that you care. I didn't mention anything but friendship in the letter, but I told him how proud I am of him and what he has accomplished and thanked him for always making me smile and being there for me. I had sent him a home made Christmas card and he immediately texted to thank me, so I expected at least a thank you for the pictures and I promised I wouldn't track the package, but it was to be delivered Friday and I thought it might not come till today. I tried not to wait for a message from him or confirmation that he got it, but nothing. So I just checked, it was delivered Friday and he has said nothing. I am disappointed in him. I however did what I needed to do to ensure that if I happened to die (one month to live) that I told him all I needed to tell him. For those of you reading me now I am asking you to remind me not to let others control my self worth. Tell me I am better than the way some of these people treat me and for the way I let them treat me. I need to tell people they are asses and I am worth more than the way they treat me.


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