Day one of unemployment. in Current Events
- April 25, 2019, 9:39 a.m.
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- Public
Day one of unemployment:
I did lose some sleep over it. I keep playing that moment in my head over and over. I also had Demi Lovato’s sorry not sorry stuck in my head at the same time. I woke up with a little hangover because I made a choice to drink on an empty stomach. Whoops.
Preserving my mental health is my first priority. I don’t want to slip into depression or end up with crippling anxiety or worse, panic mode. I have some time. I have an opportunity here to do something else and be more intentional about what I want to do next. Talking to my family and friends yesterday was hard because they all kept asking what I was going to do. My mother was already momsplaining what I should be doing immediately. That stressed me out, the wound is still fresh and my mind is blurry and confused right now. I will write down everything that I need and want to do and start tackling it tomorrow. I don’t even know if I am getting a paycheque tomorrow. The letter they gave me said that they are paying me my 8 weeks severance and that would be available on May 10th and that would be my final cheque. So am I getting paid for the last two weeks that I worked? I don’t want to contact them to find out, I have money in my savings to tie me over until the 10th for sure. When I called Employment Standards to ensure that I was indeed getting the severance that I was entitled to they mentioned that I was not entitled to that if they had just cause. Karamjeet put together a case to make it look like just cause and I don’t want to compromise my severance so I just want to exit that situation on the DL. I have enough in my savings to tie me over so I don’t have to panic. I can go a couple of months unemployed if needed… but it will not be needed because it is not like I am unemployable. Unfortunately, if I do have a paycheque tomorrow it will not be direct deposit. I will have to go down there and talk to Karamjeet.
I know that I got this. I keep asking myself “how I am feeling right now”? I need that relationship with myself. I don’t want anger. Anger turns into hate and hate turns into suffering and that leads to the dark side of the force. Thanks, Yoda. Behind anger is fear and I have a lot to fear right now so I need to stay level headed. My friend Bev refuses to let me be alone all day is bringing me a coffee. I have support. I can certainly keep my head held high and be graceful as fuck.
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