Pride in Topics

Pride is something that is talked about a lot, and often in both positive and negative terms. Arrogance, cockiness, hubris, a sin.... But it’s also something to aim for. Pride in yourself, in your accomplishments, in your family. Are they the same thing? Are they different only by degrees? Or is it simply a matter of semantics.

Either way, pride is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. It’s not a “sin” I’ve typically related to, except perhaps in deficiency. Self-confidence has never been my strong point. But then, there’s a strong tendency to hold on tightly to the things I am good at or that matter to me to the point of being prideful. That can be just as problematic as self-deprecation.

Pride comes in another form, too…one that is both simultaneously helpful and damaging. When stress levels are high, and the depression is winning....pride is can at points be the only thing left to hold on to in the moment. Choices get made, for better or worse, based on holding onto that pride. It can make asking for help difficult. But it can also create a stubbornness that can temporarily substitute for lack of willpower. I’ve done that, and it can sometimes be enough to push out of the darkest parts of the depression and stress. Not always, but it’s worked for me at times. It’s sometimes helped me make the tough decisions that I may not want to choose but know I need to in order to help myself.....choices that may even drive a temporary wedge between myself and people around me because I struggle to explain why. And often those choices are based on deciding what’s important long term rather than what might make me feel better short term.

If that makes any sense.

How to find the balance between pride, self-confidence, strength. Pride often covers some deep doubts and fears, or the complete lack of them (hence the arrogance and hubris). Pride in multiple forms.... Pride as… a crutch? A bandage over poor healed wounds and scars? It often becomes the cause of more pain. “Pride comes before the fall.”

Instead, you dive inward and start working on those buried (or not so buried) fears and doubts. In theory, that helps build the strength from within, and all those cliches. This then would negate the need for the more “false pride” style, and hopefully breed a confidence and…humility that undermines any negative form of pride while fostering the more positive forms. Easier said than done.