more log in Second 1st

The 4th determined to get better I spent time up. Sitting up, standing up, walking for no reason, trying to do dishes, laundry and whatnot. I was exhausted but I was okay. My brother texted me saying a couple packages had arrived for me there. That he would bring them up after work. Turns out i had ordered a couple things and forgot to change the mail to address. No big deal and my brother was all cool about bringing it up. We spent about an hour talking about nothing which was good for me so there is that.

The 5th we attempted the car, it was a bunch easier than walking. So I decided we would go to the Support meeting. I had been looking forward to this particular one for months and I just didn’t want to miss it. The speaker was to be a dietitian.... anyways, Rocky wanted to go to McKay’s before.... so we did. I wanted to check and see if they had any Dungeons & Dragons 3.5 players handbooks. They did some moving of things.... OMG though, they moved the RPG books to the furthest possible place from the door. No lie I’m not just exaggerating they now reside in the lonely corner on the top floor. There was some weird experience. … for me… I do wonder if it happens to other people a lot.

We were walking on the top floor and I saw a record or Melanie Martinez - Crybaby. I love this album by the way. I had been using the record bins as kind of a guide as to not walk all stupid like. When I saw it I had said something like “Crybaby, I love that album” Then Rocky asked who that was by. I took a second then told him and at that moment a nerdy, funky, cute chick walked by and said Öh, I love her!” and I pointed her in the direction of the record and went on the the lonely corner. We made it downstairs and looked for a few books in A vampire series (as opposed to THE vampire series by Anne Rice lol) he’s reading. he then had to go to the restroom and I sat on one of the two couches trying to get the world in order. Funky chick walked by once and then came and sat down. I had the overwhelming feeling she wanted to talk but neither of us said anything. I wish we would have.... one of us… something.... I feel .... like .... a missed connection. Like maybe we were that close to finding something.... something really good. It’s just an odd feeling I thought I’d throw out there.

We made it to the meeting and I was asked why I missed last month. Rocky had been sick and I needed a driver. I also told them I had just had a Gent shot and they were amazed I was there. I would say a true testament to home much I want this period to be over. The person who runs it said the sooner I start doing the therapy the better off I’ll be. The meeting itself was again disappointing. The dietitian said that there is NO EVIDENCE to support any claims that low sodium helps. WAHH!! Like there are no scientific studies on that subject at all and that the reason it’s suggested is because we ALL eat too much sodium. This being said. I’m a bit excited. I plan on being kinder to myself. Yes, I’m still using Mrs. Dash for seasoning things. I’m still going to ask that food out is prepared with no salt and take my own sauces when I can. However, I’m eating Pizza damn it. I will attempt to even it out with much lighter in salt other meals but I miss pizza a ton. Honestly, I’d be happy with just cheese but I really want some pepperoni.... or an Italian B.M.T. from Subway.... with pickles mmmmmmmmm

Anyways. ....Talked to the lady who runs the meeting and she thinks i may be better off with another doctor. I agree because I feel for sure there was not enough communication about what would happen after this step. I’ve had to watch a few videos on vestibular therapy in order to make sense of the instructions he sent home. Though honestly it would have taken like 3 mins to give a physical demonstration of what he had written down. The problem with it being written is that I couldn’t make the paper be still the first couple of days I should have been doing the things.... also they are worded so technically as if 45 degree angles of the head matter. I spent a little bit of time being concerned with the degrees of my angles before watching videos .... also his instructions say I need help with a bunch of it.... pffft. The worst thing that can happen is a bruise i think.

The 6th, yesterday, i noticed a small popping in my ear. It sounds like a slow crinkling of a plastic bag. Not constant but here and there. Seems like a good sign. The therapy wears me out. The doing things wears me out.

No one has done anything they didn’t HAVE TO. Like laundry gets done but none of it’s put away because that’s not needed in order to have clean cloths. Right.... so the house is a mess and I’m still not up to cleaning it. I’m sure it will be a few more days.

I have worked a little online today, did the 7am Justin’s and the 9.... about to go lay down now for a bit and hope to get back up for the 11.

Rocky has some kinda odd schedule today and is only on the schedule till 11:45. He asked for a grocery list so he can grab that before he comes home so I sent him one.

Things have been selling okay the last couple of days. I had to meet someone again yesterday and one scheduled this afternoon. I really need to be thinking about where we are getting our next inventory from and what kinds of things I want to carry. Thinking about ordering a “pallet” from BULQ.com but unsure what type I should go after.

That’s about it for now. I’ll start catching up on reading soon I promise. I really do I’m not just saying that. Currently 18 entries behind! lol