I'm Still...Me in The Road Ahead

waves tentatively Hey folks, it’s me. I’ve managed to make it through another number of days without doing anything stupid. While the voice itself has quieted for the most part, I continue to be vigilant. I applied for health insurance and am looking forward to getting my information in the mail so I can get into therapy again. The meds would probably help too. My baseline is still higher than it was last year, but apparently, it’s still not high enough to feel comfortable going naked.

The holidays felt strange and I never quite caught the spirit of any of it. Not seeing snow, 50 degree weather, the anxiety of being jobless and broke, and some polyamory concerns had me stressed out. I wood burnt some ornaments and wall hangings which I was pretty happy with and I got to go to Final Fantasy Fan Festa earlier last month. It was a lot of fun and I got to spend the whole weekend just geeking out over my silly mobile game.

Still no word on the job front. I send out a few resumes every day, with most days having me sending at least a dozen of those little rat bastards out. I’ll continue sending them out until something finally pans out and do my best not to get discouraged.

I went to Urgent Care yesterday to get some antibiotics for a nasty little gum infection I had. It happens every few months and I usually power through it, but it was so painful to eat or talk or breathe, I bit the bullet and sought medical professionals. The antibiotic is known for making some patients shit themselves silly, but I’ve so far avoided this side effect. knocks on wood

Things with my partners are going pretty well! They met at the friends Holiday party and they didn’t hate each other, so it’s a victory! I get a lot of support and encouragement from both of them and I’m really happy and grateful to have them both in my life. I think I’m looking for one more romantic partner and open to new lovers always. My Boo and i made a profile on a new poly/queer dating app, looking for other folks to engage in fun and consensual adult behaviors. No bites yet, but it seems like they’re still doing some work on the app, as I’m not able to view the shared profile, just my solo. Meeting some new folks for games and stuff next week, so that should be exciting. And Friday I’m heading to a LGS to play some board games and hopefully make some new friends. :)

Still looking for a place to park/stay too. Without a job, getting into regular housing again is a pipe dream, but I might be able to find a dependable place to plug in and get access to wifi, so I can take care of things from the van. Plus I’d be able to game again, which I really miss being able to do reliably. But the search is on, the feelers are out there, and I’m sure something will come through.

Okay, I’m starting to lose focus. I need to top off on meds and find someplace comfortable to curl up for the night. Hopefully some of my streamers will be on tonight. It really helps make the whole thing less lonely. :)

I hope everyone else had a great holiday season and that y’all find the peace you’re looking for this year. <3