um. pain update thing. filling. and head injury. no advice as usual. so like uncles. and death. and from the bar. mentions SU rape. no details though. from. oct. 3rd. in 2018

delayed entry.

‘ again. i don’t want advice.

so um. well i was feeling better from my cavity er i mean my filling up till um. yesterday morning which was. um. tues. that’s right. and then the jaw pain kicked in.

um. oh right so the on the 13th i found out that my late best friend’s uncle had died. yeah he the uncle died from a stroke. he was such a nice guy. Bob. the late best friend is Pat.

and the. well recently i found out via fb that a friend of mine jen from the bar was. um going through a difficult time. i won’t post any details bc of confidentiality. but when i read her. her um post i hit her up and was ‘i. omygod how can i help?’ i haven’t heard from her since but in a wk. or so i’ll hit her up again. we’re not like close but i’ve always liked her. i can’t really do much else about it [and what else i can do i won’t] due to my living situation. and i don’t have her # so. like oh god. um also. when i read that well it was 1 in the morning that being her post i also prayed for her. to The Universe/Pat. like and i don’t do that a lot. [i was also drunk which led to me being more emotional then usual.]. no questions asked please.

um. oh so the rights restriction is probably being lifted next wk. there’ll be a mtng. about it. please look back in my blog for details > this btw has nothing to do w/ the above paragraph on jen - as i don’t feel like bothering to explain. just. i’m really excited about it and i’m ready. it is long overdue.

um. i’ve had a setback recently. again. my like. the part between a person’s neck and their shoulder. is like in pain. it’s not terrible pain but it’s distracting.

oh and btw. i don’t like oct. everyone’s like ‘yay it’s fall’ and i’m like don’t remind me. apparently. 7 or 8 yrs. ago yesterday which was the 2nd. i broke it off from the guy who’d raped [yes pushed me into sex] me a wk. after my 24th birthday. i didn’t realise at first that that’s all he wanted from me. but yeah i did it via email. broke it off i mean. 7 or 8 yrs. a go. and the only reason i know of the exact date is bc of my fb memories.

also. either today or um tom. is apparently karlye’s 31st. karlye for those who don’t remember was the friend of mine who um offed herself when she was 16. no details other then those. happy birthday beautiful girl.

and then the 14th of this month it marks uh 13 yrs. since i was raped. the first time. at 17. and then. well so i don’t like this month. ‘