2018 fail in Current Events

*I feel like I have failed at everything I wanted to do this year. * I shut that thought down as soon as it comes up but it’s been eating away at me. I’ve been purging my social media. Deleted all my Instagram photos and deactivated my Facebook. I packed up most of my belongings to donate to Salvation Army and I feel… feels. I just need to be alone to charge myself. Roommates have literally been home all week and crashed my days off. I unfollowed everybody on IG and I had mixed emotions about it. Seeing all those people who don’t actually care about my wellbeing and then letting them go from my mind was something else. Letting go of all my possessions and only keeping what I use actually took all year. It’s hard to let go of things that are sentimental and things that I want to believe that I will use one day. Almost three years ago I decided to give up the stress of having to worry about my hair so I decided to grow it out so I could just throw it up. Now after years of working hard to get that physique every man is suppose to have i find myself hating my body more than ever. I should quit that too but not before I start seeing a therapist to help me manage my self esteem and my possible borderline personality disorder. I even quit my pixel laser and photo facials for my acne scar treatments. I’m embarking on something way more invasive that I want to save up for. I never did say out loud what my goals were this year, nor did I write them on here but I have all these superficial things in my way because I don’t know how to face the world anymore. I’ll just stop rambling now.