Rest of Europe trip (pics) in Adventures in paradise

I’m back home in Australia! :D

Man, that flight back was a doozy. 18.5 hours all up I think. Probably even longer. For some reason, Emirates do a stop-over in Singapore on the way home, but they didn’t on the way there, so that was weird and added a few hours to the trip. Also not fun is disembarking the plane with all your shit, walking into the terminal to the next gate over, and scanning all your stuff through again. Ergh. Waste of time! But hey, Singapore is a dictatorship and that’s the law, so yeah. At least I guess I can say I’ve been in Singapore?
I really didn’t want to be though. Ever since I saw that movie about the Aussies who were executed with no mercy because they were tricked by drug mules into exporting/importing drugs, I’ve been put right off Singapore. Not that I do drugs or anything, but I must admit I was panicking about having just come from Portugal (where drugs aren’t a big deal at ALL) and what if I’d wheeled my suitcase through some drugs or some shit and it comes up on their system? I know it’s a long shot, but man that sure was running through my damn head at the time.
Anyway, I forgot to empty out my water bottle as it went through the scanner and the dude was like, ‘Is this your bag sir?’ and I said, “Yes” and he mentioned the water bottle and I was just so tired at that point I think I was like, “Soz, whatever,” and he threw it in the bin. I mean seriously, as if I’ve just been on a plane with something dangerous in my water bottle.
I also thought it was seriously over-the-top with all the heat-detection cameras they have set up as your walking into the terminal. I was thinking like, “Jesus, Singapore, calm the fuck down!”
I seriously dunno if I’d ever visit there. People who have been seem to like it. I guess I’ve just been put off a little bit.
So anyway, made it back to Brisbane at 12:30am. The only way to get home at that hour was by cab (or Uber) so that set me back almost $40 but I had cash from exchanging some of my currency back in Prague. I still have more to change over but she didn’t have enough.

The trip itself - amazing.
I think I last wrote when I was on the train from Madrid to Barcelona. I haven’t even written since then, it’s just been a whirlwind and I was just doing so much stuff that I didn’t even have time to write. None of the vlog ideas happened either. I was just fitting way too much in.
I had 16.5 hour days (of sunlight) where I was and I sure made use of every bit of it.

Obviously some hostels were better than others. I think my favourite was the Madrid one. My least favourite was the Lisbon one and I have no idea how they have such high reviews other than for location. Barcelona’s hostel was new and snazzy with fingerprint access to the rooms. It was advertised as a gay hostel but I didn’t get the impression at all staying there, other than the change-rooms being all open.
Barcelona was absolutely beautiful and completely different to Madrid. My day trip to Sitges was pretty cool too. Again, a lot of walking. A hell of a lot of walking, especially to get to the gay beach which was the other side of town. I swear it took me about 1.5 hours to walk there. But I was so happy I did it. I was thankful for Google Maps leading me most of the way until I lost signal, but it was enough to figure out from there and back. It really was the middle of nowhere. There were probably about 10 others on the gay beach and it’s pretty spread out. I even got naked and got into the Mediterranean. Only briefly though because it was all big round rocks and I was afraid of slipping over and the last thing I needed was to be airlifted out of Spain because I’d knocked myself out and drowned. Pretty liberating though! And to get to the beach, I had to cross a railway line which the high-speed train flies past in both directions every so often, so there are guys there getting selfies with the train as it flies past. Pretty insane. Anyone on that train could easily look over and down to see a heap of naked guys on the beach lol.
i got back to Barcelona in time for the incredible Magic Fountain water and light show, so that was pretty awesome to see in person.

I caught a RyanAir flight from Barcelona to Rome, and they were totally fine, because I’d done my research and bought the proper ticket I needed. I also had extra legroom, which was handy.
I had 4 nights in Rome, but to be honest, I think it was too long. It’s hard to predict these things but I was pretty over it after a while lol. I did end up taking a day trip to Naples, but it was a bit scary to start with. I think I walked out the wrong side of the train station or something because it was dodgy as fuck. But thankfully I ended up finding a nice area and ended up with a bunch of beautiful photos in the end and I’m glad I went. I made it back to the train station with literally 30 seconds to spare to catch the last train back to Rome, since it was a 3ish-hour trip each way, which I didn’t mind at all. I was just taking it all in. I was very surprised that no-one checked my ticket, both directions. It wasn’t much for a 2nd class ticket but I could have gotten away with it for free haha. It was cool seeing all the people run across the tracks to catch the last train back to the big city. I didn’t have any trouble, thankfully. I didn’t feel unsafe at all, but when I first got to Naples. Apparently that’s where the mafia are lol.

After Rome it was further up north to Florence. Florence was a 2-night stop and it ended up being my absolute favourite city in Italy. I just fell in love with it. The whole Tuscany area actually is just spectacular and anyone who lives there I am insanely jealous of. I took the half-hour day trip to Pisa and obviously saw the leaning tower. Again, cool to see in person. Tons of tourists but I got there pretty early so it wasn’t as bad as it was in the afternoon. I ate some yummy Italian food there. Some guy set up and played some music and then went around afterwards with a hat collecting money. I was thinking, “Umm, no I don’t think so. I didn’t ask you to play whilst I’m just trying to enjoy a meal.” I know it’s polite to give them something, but geez, the cheek. I just shook my head lol.
A guy at the Colloseum was the worst though. He’d basically forced a stupid band on my wrist, tell me it’s free, then come back later and tell me he has a family of 8 kids he needs to feed. Even though I’d refused it heaps of times to start with, he put it on me and when he came back I took it off and forced it back to him. The fucking tactics, I tell you what. He was annoying me almost as much as the guy in Lisbon was who was trying to sell me drugs omn the street lol.
Anyway, in Florence, I hooked up with the hottest guy ever. Like, seriously 11/10-hot. He had the hottest face, body, ass and a huge dick. He basically wanted me to use him, and I sure did. It was a bit scary going there to start with, because when I walked in, it was pitch black. I needed to use my flashlight app to even find where the stairs were. Once again, I didn’t want to be calling my insurance company and lying to them that I tripped in public and not at all on my way up to some trade’s apartment.
Anyway, he opened the door, and the hottest guy I’ve seen in ages was standing there. WAY hotter than the pics he’d sent me. So that definitely added to the Florence experience. Turns out he lives in Rotterdam, but is from Germany, and is studying in Florence.

After Florence was Venice, a 1-night, 2 day trip. It was all I needed there really. Had to catch a ferry over to the other main island, but that was okay. I bought a 24-hour pass and timed it so that I’d come back to get my train the following night. I love the high-speed Italo trains by the way. So cool. Venice is a beautiful city and is like a maze in those back-streets. Definitely not suitcase friendly though. I was fine with my little one but even that was annoying at times. I have no idea how people with those huge-ass suitcases walk their way around Venice. Near impossible. Anyway, once I ditched my bags, I was fine, and ended up getting some pretty cool photos. I’ll put my photos at the end since I have to backtrack a little anyway.

Milan was next! This was a fascinating city to explore. Just designers everywhere I went. And a big city too. I sent a message back to Vish in Australia saying that he needs to buy a burial plot here for when he dies, because he will die when he sees it lol.
My hostel here was good, but loud, as I was here over the weekend. Also, the guy below me threw up everywhere. At least 7 or 8 times, he just hurled and hurled and hurled onto the floor next to his bed. I just started laughing and thought, “You’ve GOT to be kidding me…”
Thank FUCK I was on the top bunk that time because if I wasn’t, I would have worn it.
I mean, what sort of idiot doesn’t run to the bathroom when they are throwing up? Him, obviously lol. Thankfully, the next across from him must’ve complained to management and they moved him to another room the night after. I had zero sleep that night because of the smell.
That hostel has cages to lockers, so of course some of his vomit had bounced back onto my bags. Thankfully not much though!
I hooked up with a cute Asian guy in Milan too, so that was nice.

After Milan was Zurich. I was absolutely blown away by the scenery of the Alps as the train passed through. Like, everyone else on the train just looked bored and probably used to catching that train every day, but I was like a puppy dog with it’s head out the window. At least, I would have been had I been able to stick my head out the window. I just could not believe what I was seeing.

I loved Zurich. I actually reminded me of home a lot. And Swiss money is so pretty! I loved the water fountains everywhere in the city. I did get lost once though, so that was a little scary, and frustrating because I didn’t get lost the day before.
But anyway, my very first night in Zurich was my first hotel stay! Up on top of the mountain, and my God, it was as spectacular as the photos on the website. I could not believe I was there, really. And to be in a comfortable bed after all these hostels, and a TV and a coffee machine (which I embarrassingly had to get them to show me how to use LOL) but the view itself was unreal. I must’ve taken a bazillion pics up there.

I then went to a hostel for two more nights in Zurich, which again, I think was a bit long for me, but hey, I had fun. I definitely didn’t get sick of it like I did Rome. I hooked up with two guys in the Zurich hostel haha! One blew me in the bathroom, and the other one was another top who I sucked off. I was on a roll and thought, ‘Why not?’ and he had a great dick, so it was definitely hot as fuck.

From Zurich was the luxury bus ride! It was pretty special being on it. The only problem was, because I was in the very front, there was no room for my legs, so it made sleeping very awkward and uncomfortable, but as luck would have it, there was a huge electrical storm happening that night, and I had a front-row view of it all unfolding over the countryside of four different countries that the bus passed through - Switzerland, Austria, Germany and Czech Republic! I was just in awe. And the bus stopped in Austria for a break, so of course I had to get off the bus just to say I’d stepped into Austria (lol, such a child!). We were stopping for 10 minutes so I went into the shop to get a drink and of course the guy in front of me was counting out his coins at the counter. I was like, ‘FFS, if I get stranded in Austria, Im’a cut a bitch.”

Anyway, Prague. Incredible city. Very intimidating when I first arrived (like most cities) but pretty damn cool once I got more used to it. The bus arrived at 5am so I had heaps of time to kill before I could check in, and as I hadn’t really slept on the bus at all, I was so damn tired and wanted to get a nap in. That was a cool hostel as well, with curtains for privacy around the beds. The mattress however, was like a slab of concrete. The breakfast there was amazing, like most hostels. I went into Prague Castle, which is gigantic btw. It’s also free after 7pm so I went back later since it’s daylight until 9pm there. The guard at the entrance to the castle was so insanely attractive that I couldn’t stop looking at him.

Home was via Amsterdam back to Lisbon for a one-night stay at an airport hotel. The KLM flight was delayed but thankfully they held back the connecting flight so that I could make it (phew). They also had the best airline food I’ve ever had in my life!

The flight home was pretty great. The first flight was full, but the two seats to me ended up being free, so I could spread out! Could not believe my luck. I’d checked in online the night before and it said they were taken, so I’m guessing they must’ve missed their flight or something.
Then in Dubai, I had the extra leg-room seat since it was the longer-leg. 18.5 hours all up for the trip back. It felt like FOREVER. And horrific turbulence once we were past Mt. Isa for some reason. Like, I was breathing through my nose and out through my mouth slowly, trying not to throw up. It was throwing us around pretty badly. And of course some stupid bitch gets up to use the restroom in the middle of it all lol. A voice over the speakers yelled, “Do not use the lavoratories! It is not safe!”
She went in anyway. I assume maybe he had to throw up. There was no way I was standing up though. If I had to throw up, it was gonna be like the guy in Milan - ie. Right then and there!
Thankfully I didn’t. The flighties served a sandwhich shortly after and I as like, “If I try to eat this now, I will hurl.”

I was so thankful to land and arrive home. That stopover in Singapore added another two-hours to the trip.

Here’s some of my pics from the trip!

Me at the Eurovision Song Contest, Lisbon, Portugal

Me in Nazare’, Portugal

You have to peg your clothes really good up here

Porto, Portugal

Madrid - the oldest restaurant in the world! Started in 1210 and has had a flame-oven that has been burning continuously every day since.

Barcelona

Of course my stupid finger’s in the way lol

Sitges - me walking naked into the Mediterranean
https://www.facebook.com/pfefz/videos/10156465853914855/

Rome

Naples

Florence!

This was my favourite Pisa photo I took lol

Venice

Milan

Zurich

This was the fancy bus

Prague

At the airport in Prague. I so thought the chick behind me was gonna photo-bomb me, but she was too busy laughing with her boyfriend/husband.

I also hooked up with one of the staff members in the airport. When I found where he was, he just texted, “Follow me” and we went down to these toilets where there was absolutely nobody. I guess he’d know all the spots!
He was blowing me and he just shot his load all over the floor and left it there, and went to sign on for work. I was like, WTF? Who does that!? Surely they have cleaners!
I’m just glad he didn’t get any on my carry on. Oh well, it wouldn’t have been the first bodily fluid on it this trip HA! I didn’t get off that time but that’s okay. At least I can say I hooked up in Czechia :P

So that made 7 guys for the trip. Not that I was counting…

I actually have hundreds of pics but these are just some I liked :)

Now time to work off some jetlag. I’m off to Perth tomorrow night! That cheap Tiger sale from last year has arrived.

Last updated June 06, 2018