What you did. in Elm

What you did.

Was nothing  special.

But it was special

You were special

I cared about you.

I guess i shouldnt  have

It bled me dry.

I knew it.

But i couldn't  stop.

I dont know why.

But i kept repeating a pattern.

Different person

But always you.

Always you.

I am so confused

What is it about you

I need to learn ?

Keeps going in a circle

Boomeranging back to you

Until it got so big and bad

And we got torn apart.

I think this time for good.

God is saving me from you

Because i never would  have left.

I was there until death.

I am not mad.

I am not sad really.

I dont know how to describe the feeling

Except  its familiar  to me.

I was steeped in something

I never choose you.

You never  really choose me.

Now its over and gone

Im.relieved

I feel ripped off

I feel cheated

Not by you

You are always who u are

Bad

Sick

Dangerous

Violent

Im upset at those around us

For not doing shit to stop it.

Because  we both know none of us had the intention of stopping it all.

In above my my head.

Bit off more than we could chew

Especially  you.

Last updated March 15, 2019