T-minus 13 days in Stuff

My leg injury seems to have been a three-day thing, as I barely noticed it today. Just a little bit, but I haven’t had to walk anywhere so there’s that. I’m off to the Goldy soon though to Brent’s place, so it’ll be good to have some laughs. I can just see him making me watch ‘It’ tonight, even though I hate horror movies (unless it’s The Ring or comedy-horros like ‘Better Watch Out’, I loved those!)
Brent’s finishing work late and tomorrow’s a public holiday so I may even stay down there for part of tomorrow, I dunno. I just hope there’s no fuckheads on the train. I still get anxious ever since that time that meth-head shoved me at Coomera. I’m getting off one station before that station this time, wheras previously I had to get off one station after. The time I had to get off at Coomera was a once-off that ended up being a horrible decision. But anyway, happy thoughts.

This morning after getting up and having a shower, I was having lovely thoughts about death lol. I was just thinking about how Matty S killed himself last week and wondered where he is now, if he’s anywhere, whether that’s it, kaput, gone, dust. Whether he’s now ghost at Sporties, the gay bar down the road where he worked.
I remember snapping myself out of my thought-trance and thinking, “Jesus Christ Matt, it’s way too early in the morning to be thinking about death.” But yeah, there I was. It happens to all of us, eventually, and it’s fucking terrifying not knowing the unknown. I guess I’ve always thought about it as not being any different to the day before I was born, or even conceived. I’m not sure when exactly memory thoughts begin. I sure as hell don’t remember being inside a womb with blood vessels floating by me. I feel like maybe I had a dream like that once upon a time, or maybe I really do remember it. But I don’t remember much from my early childhood at all, if anything. I should get dad to bring up his old home videos sometime and rewatch them, you know - to see how much of an awkward kid I was to how I am now. I’m sure not much has changed.

In other news, I just found out that Andrew (my landlord) has a job here in Brisbane at the end of May. So he’ll be back home before I am! I’m seriously considering having the talk with him about moving out of here. It’s just been way too long and time have flown and it’s been great, but it’s time. I also don’t think I like the new housemate very much. We’re just very different and kind of clash personality-wise. Him and Kurt get along, but Kurt’s the type of guy who can get along with anyone.
It’ll also mean once I move out that I’ll try and live alone, which will be at least twice as expensive in rent as it is now, which means I won’t have a life lol. But it’s not like I have one anyway, in general.
In my defense, I have been trying not to spend money, as I leave for Portugal in 13 DAYS! Holy fuck. And I haven’t learned any languages or even the basics. The way I’m going, I’ll be doing it on the plane. And man, I’m not looking forward to that huge-ass flight again. Europe is SO FUCKING FAR AWAY GUYZ!! Hence why I need to spend an entire month there each time I go, to make it worth it. Also freaking out about affording it, but I do have to keep reminding myself that I get holiday pay whilst I’m over there. Phew. I remember hanging out for it each week last time lol.

With Andrew now coming back, it means I can no longer stay with him for free in London, which, although now more expensive, means it frees up my time by about another week, so I’m thinking of now staying in Europe and maybe seeing another country, although the idea of going back to an English-speaking country for a while after three weeks of not understand anything is really appealing also. I have tomorrow to think about it. On my days off next week, I’m sure I’ll really be freaking out, as it’ll be 6 days away then. I’m going in warmer weather this time so I can’t really bring my big-ass jacket with me which I used to hide all my stuff in, but I don’t want to get cold either. Ahhhh! Travel-bugs, help me out!

Anyway I’m off to the Goldy. Just English-speaking, muscled-up, bronzed bogans there. Hopefully no meth-heads.

Last updated April 23, 2018