Would You Look At That in Book Five: Working Through the Maze 2018

So… a way to start the new week.

Remember last week when White Boss told me to straight up move my car appointment? Instead of asking me if it would affect work or trying to determine what my plans were… just defaulting to being a presumptuous dick? Well… I took my car in for that appointment, refusing to change it because I’m actually not a completely idiotic asshat. Got my rental car. On my drive in to the office, received a text saying that a client would be coming to the office at 9 and they needed to get some paperwork for their immigration case. Not my case. Not my client. So why was I receiving this text? Because (1) the Chinese Staff know that I get to the office before they do. Every work day ever. (2) the Chinese Staff (none of them) were going to be in the office “on time.” So… what we have here… is White Boss telling me that I need to rearrange an emergency (and much needed) car appointment… me refusing to do that… and still being only one of 2 people who were at the office on time. Yeah. Still waiting for the Chinese staff. Including Chinese Boss. Aaaaaaand according to the Work Calendar… besides the 9:00 client that nobody was here for… the only thing on Chinese Staff’s schedule for today doesn’t start until 5:00 p.m. So tell me again why I’m the target for negative presumptions?

Over lunch, I have read two articles from two diverse sources both discussing the same element… an element very close to my heart in many respects. Christianity in America and the connection of Evangelicals and Conservatives to Donald Trump. In larger ways and more impassioned ways than they were for either Bush Presidents or Ronald Reagan.

This is particularly important to me as someone who still fully identifies as a Christian… and has a great deal of trouble when I hear Evangelical Leaders giving a general pass to Donald Trump. Not because I don’t believe in Grace. Trust me. If Trump were penitent and faithful, I’d be holding him up as a model. But he isn’t. He’s the kind of con artist who looks to the Christians and says, “I have to sin. I have to sin a lot. Because if I don’t sin, I have no need for grace. So I’m a Christian because I keep apologetically sinning.” But technically… he’s not even doing that. What he is doing, and what he is, is far worse in my opinion. Because he is part of the Prosperity Gospel. Christianity has all sorts of… strange… mutations in the United States. Quiver-Full received a considerable amount of attention because of the Duggers. Any time a woman is asked/told to have around 20 children… it raises eyebrows. But the Quiver-Full movement essentially borrows elements from Mormonism and some gender-regressive other sects. The Prosperity Gospel is just… flat out blasphemy (imho). The Prosperity Gospel says “God loves a winner” and that “God will bestow wealth and success on those he loves best.” Let me tell you… I’ve read the Bible. Old Testament, New Testament, Non-cannonical books. Historical commentaries. I’ve done my reading. The Prosperity Gospel is not based on faith.

So I completely understand why so many articles today are covering this bizarre adoration between Trump and Evangelical Christians. It seems… strange as hell. That Evangelicals, who once said “Homosexuality, Abortion, and Infidelity caused 9-11” are now constantly tripping over themselves for Trump? I don’t want to speak on this topic, really. There are so many articles that were published today I feel like I would just be adding to the chorus. But… I wanted to say unequivocally… there is still a place for Christianity in America… Christians can be thoughtful, compassionate, understanding people. But if your politics matter more than your faith? Maybe you and I should have a conversation about Jesus’ statement covering how many masters you can serve at once.

(And lest we forget this photo op… the Evangelical Endorsement & The Playboy Magazine)

It shouldn’t surprise me.

I should really start expecting this kind of thing.

I mean, after all, this happens often enough that it should be obvious.

But HOLY SHIT DOES IT STILL PISS ME OFF!

This afternoon, a phone call came in to the office. Dylan took the message, delivered it to Chinese Boss. Chinese Boss forwards me the message and says “Can you call them, see what they want?” So I do. The person on the other end of the phone? “Wei, ni hao?” I tried. I told them who I was. I told them who I was calling for. The whole time? “Sorry. I don’t speak English. No, I don’t know what you are saying. I don’t speak English.” Tell me again why the fuck Chinese Boss keeps doing this?! Of all the things that do happen or have happened at this law firm… this is the one that makes me the most angry and has been the most consistent. It really seems fairly simple.
(1) If your firm is catering almost exclusively to the Chinese speaking community; and
(2) you have staff that CAN speak Chinese and staff that CAN’T speak Chinese; then
(3) sort the language shit out!

Perfect. Now more bullshit from Chinese Boss. Who here has ever had to call their local DOT customer service line? Hands? I don’t know how it is in other places in the world, but phone calls to the DOT tend to take forever. The first hurdles to their system take between five and ten minuets. Then you are on hold anywhere from twenty minutes to three hours. That is standard. So… this is why I constantly tell Chinese Boss that telling her Chinese Clients to hire us for every little traffic violation is actually border-line unethical… because they could pay anywhere from $200 to $500 dollars just on me being on hold whereas their bloody ticket would be less expensive. Instead? She’s docking my pay. “Two hours on hold is inappropriate.” This woman… seriously… this woman. I think just about anything else with this law firm would be within my ability to tolerate… but this woman!

Ah… the phone call thing makes more sense now. This is just what Chinese Boss has decided to do with EVERY phone call. Apparently, I am the attorney who “calls people back.” Wait… so… I’m the secretary? I did receptionist duty on Friday… what the hell woman?

I wanted to share two examples of this language bullshit that just… really… baffles me. Not baffles me, I guess but… demonstrates the absolute fuck-dickery of the whole thing.

AGAIN… Chinese Boss wants me to research shit. In Chinese. From Chinese Websites. That she wants me to find. On my fucking own. Ex. Plode. I search and search and search but “Dream TV” doesn’t exactly produce results. It keeps sending me to pages that either say “Shinco Animation” or “Xinke Animation”. Who fucking knows?! Finally, after spending an hour looking… I use the Shinco Animation. Send it in. I am asked “Where the hell did you get this name from?” I explain. Then I ask if it would have been better to use “Xinke Animation?” And I am told… no, that isn’t right either. Frustrated at my incompetence, Chinese Boss sends me a link for research (again, if you had it… why are you asking me to look for it?!). I click the link… completely and totally in Chinese. WHICH I DON’T READ. So, I clicked the button to have the internet translate it. TOP OF THE PAGE: Home Page of Xinke Animation. CONTENT OF THE PAGE: Shinco Animation has been around since..... So… FUCK YOU! Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you. You absolute heinous bitch.

That is the first part of my translation frustration. The second, I have already mentioned… but will mention again.
Our client is an award winning animation director. As previously stated, I don’t speak Chinese so I can’t read the Chinese Petition he sent us. Instead, I read the English version of the Petition he sent us.

The award he is said to have given out is clearly referred to as THE GOLDEN MONKEY AWARD. I did research. The organization he was with at the time do give out a Golden Monkey King Award (shorthanded to Golden Monkey) for Animation. Thus, I write about The Golden Monkey King Award. Chinese boss says this is incorrect. Chinese Boss says that the Chinese Language word is actually “Golden Dinosaur Award” for Animation. Thus, I need to re-do the research and fix it. This makes me explode for three reasons.
(1) MONKEY versus DINOSAUR is a big translation issue. If you’re telling me that the client’s own translated words are not to be trusted why in the fuck have me work on this project at all?! Because I can’t read the Chinese Version to know if the English Version is incorrect. I’ll base my research off of the English Version.
(2) Even if the Chinese Version of the Petition says “Golden Dinosaur” and the English Version says “Golden Monkey”… my research FOUND THE ACTUAL AWARD. It is a golden monkey. Given out by the guy’s organization. So… dinosaur or monkey… I’m not relying on the translation of what the client sent us… I’m relying on what the Organization’s English Page says. You’re calling that wrong?
(3) And lets go for the topper! In all of my “Post-Chinese Boss Correction” research… I haven’t found anything for Animation Awards cross referenced with Dinosaur. I did however find a Chinese Poster clearly depicting the award and calling it the Golden Monkey Award.

So… I don’t speak Chinese. Stop giving me Chinese Language shit. But if you are going to give me Chinese Language shit… trust that I’m not making up the translation stuff. Our client, his organization, and his entire industry are not saying Dinosaur… when THIS is the award!

IIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin other news… my car was totaled. In order to fix Laira, it would cost $7,475.17. And she still would have issues. The liability individual’s insurance is willing to shell out $7,739.35 in total for replacement. Considering that is roughly 78% of what I paid to get that car in the first place? Yeah. But… looking at replacements a little bit already? That estimate covers half of replacement costs. So… I have a decision to make.