Life. Oh life. in Book Five: Working Through the Maze 2018

This morning, I decided to sleep in.
After all, I don’t have a key to get inside this new office and I’m not going to show up to work “on time” if it means that I have to wait in my car until someone shows up. But… me being who I am… I still made sure to be at the office at 9. If nobody was going to be here at THAT time then this whole system really is going to implode on itself. White Boss was here. That’s it. None of the Chinese Staff. And… my head wants to explode. Life isn’t that hard when you apply yourself logically to a situation. (1) Have an expected schedule for your staff; (2) Hold yourself accountable to that schedule and to your staff; (3) Make sure you and your staff have the resources needed to complete the job (like… keys… or heat); (4) Don’t push forward without a stable foundation. Nope. Their whole thing is “If we’re not moving forward, we’re not successful.” Ooookay… but if you’re not successful it is because you didn’t spend enough time on fundamentals and foundation.... anyone can wildly push forward like a madman… it takes a wise professional to slow down and do things right.

Of course… the heater still doesn’t work. Just for my floor. Upstairs is fine. And I tested the computer last night at home. The display issues I’m having? Yes, they are related to temperature. When I brought the laptop into the car last night, I did a touch test. Even though the laptop had been running all day… the laptop casing (plastic surface) was icy cold. I brought it home, surrounded it in blankets, got it warm… tested it again… warm, not a single display issue. So… it is officially that cold. That the heat produced by the laptop is being canceled out by the cold to the point where, even if the laptop is running all day, it still gets so cold that it begins to have display issues. Super. So the firm’s solution? They gave Dylan the day off… Muse is at a satellite location today… so I’m the RECEPTIONIST. I am an attorney with open cases and a list of things I am required to do for my clients… but because the firm wanted to give Chinese Receptionist the day off, I am acting Receptionist.
Oh… and you know how my car got SLAMMED INTO while in the Firm’s Parking lot. My appointment for that is at 9 a.m. Obviously, I am going to take my car into the Collision Center earlier than 9am because that is when the appointment is. As I am not an irresponsible fuck, I have worked it so that I have a rental car. As the firm opens at 9 am, that means I will be in the office by 9 a.m. But to remind myself that I have the appointment, I put it on my calendar. Y’know… the calendar the bosses are supposed to look at but never seem to (as far as my Court schedule?) WELL… White Boss did look at the calendar… saw that my collision center appointment was at 9. THEN TOLD ME I HAD TO CHANGE WHEN MY CAR APPOINTMENT WAS! Seriously. His e-mail said, ” I understand that you need to get your car fixed, but we cannot have you absent on Monday morning at 9 a.m. We are too busy, especially on Mondays. Please reschedule or arrange for someone else to take your car in. Thanks.”

Right. SO after MONTHS of being the first person in the office… often hours before White Boss or Chinese Boss… and in connection with a new office where I don’t have keys… White Boss isn’t going to ask if my appointment will conflict with work. He isn’t going to discuss with me if this will make me late to work or not. He flat out tells me to reschedule or get someone else to do it. It is a fucking good thing that today is Friday. Because if this were only Tuesday.... I can promise you that I’d have gotten fired this week. Right now I am so close to exploding on both of them that… just a little but more shit… and I’ll just open right the fuck up. Seriously. Just… ka-boom.

I suppose it shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise but… apparently… me trying to do work at Reception is “distracting” to the bosses who had to close their doors. My typing and talking on the phone doesn’t fit with their “quiet” Top Floor desires. Well… I’m not likely to get 20 billable hours this week. Which means you’re going to bitch at me next week. But I’m going to try to get as much work done as I can because… and breathe this in… I’m going to take care of shit whether you like it or not. Because shit needs to get taken care of.

Nope. The idiocy.. the idiocy is overwhelming. CAN’T HANDLE IT TODAY. Yesterday YESTERDAY I had a meeting with Chinese Boss. “What is the update on this client?” was her question.
My answer: His preliminary hearing, which he won’t have to attend, is scheduled for the 26th. That is just a calendar marker requiring the State to have something filed by that date. Until then, there isn’t much we can do because we don’t know what the State has.

That was YESTERDAY. And… frankly… elementary fucking stuff for Criminal Law. But… as Chinese Boss doesn’t exclusively deal in Criminal Law… I can do my job and explain things in a way in which a client could understand. Because that is my job. Taking THE LAW and breaking it down for clients unfamiliar with the legal process. (Though, why I’m doing that for a lawyer who is also my boss, that you can ask for yourself).

That was yesterday.
This morning… she e-mails me: “What are the updates on this case?”
Well… thanks for acting like a client instead of a damned attorney, boss. Nothing has changed in the last 24 hours. When I told you that the next event would happen around March 26th… I wasn’t explaining that for my health. Seriously? Why do I file internal reports and memos, then? Do you honestly not know what the fuck is going on or is this some strange inter-office game I haven’t figured out?

Here’s a funny one. You know that Assistant City Attorney job I applied to in September? So.... five and a half months ago! They e-mailed me last night, thanking me for applying, but telling me that the money that was ear marked for that position has now been swallowed by local government costs that were expected to be taken care of by the State budget (which is all kinds of fucked up). I mean… I’m glad to hear back. I’m pissed that Iowa keeps thinking that the best way forward is to make sure the government spends nothing while maintaining and raising taxes. And I’m unhappy that I won’t be getting the job (I gave up on that job about 5 months ago). But I find it worth sharing to show how slow government moves, how screwed Iowa’s budget is, and the kind of stuff that lawyers deal with (as far as time tables).

I know it would absolutely cause my bosses to black list me but… I am so tempted to get them a gift for when I leave. Just something small, tasteful.... and from Ai Weiwei. Rofl.

Trying to kill time because I couldn’t leave the desk (yes, I am stooping to having Jimmy John’s delivered) I read an article in the New York Times. It could have been any article but I only get a select few for free and so I try to only read the ones whose headlines and synopsis either seem interesting or of significant National or International importance. This one grabbed my attention as it was on one of my favorite human subjects: past love. I read it and it was interesting, well written but not significantly any more poetic or profound than what I read here on Prosebox. It got me thinking. Why did this individual get to share his reminiscence with an International Audience and get paid for it? What separates him and me? Granted… his story was about an affair. The woman was married, they shared a passionate few months together, the woman broke it off. End of story. But… did that fact alone make it worth an International Audience? Did the illicit nature of the love affair create a situation where the author deserved remuneration for the story? I am not about to claim that my life’s events are worth of an international audience… but if this story was worth even a hundred dollars to publish… how does one get into that? Or… as I’ve long suspected… is the very art of writing for a living passing away? Is the internet so full of Blogs and Streams and Youtube stars that CONTENT is KING but Popularity is Profit. But then… hasn’t that always been the case? Tiny Town had a newspaper. A small insert that would be delivered with the Des Moines Register (many big cities in Iowa have their own paper, but The Des Moines Register has the widest state-wide circulation). While it is certainly true that such a small thing was desperate for content… it also couldn’t have been making money. Money is made when enough people are willing to pay for something that the Costs are taken care of and there is money left over… the very definition of the idea of profit. But… I still… with the conclusion of this job and my love of typing and writing… I am just very much thinking “how can I get paid to do this? How could I get paid to write articles about Government Policy and Law and Entertainment?” And when people say “Be a reporter, go into Journalism” I have but to think of my good friend P. Kim. She dedicated her life to journalism. Year older than I am. The most “long term” job she had was for an internet company that collapsed on itself after 3 years. She did a stint at Buzz Feed for less than 12 months. In short… her career as a reporter has more jobs in it and less stability than my career in the law so far.

But… writing, typing, getting paid for thoughts… certainly something I’ll have to consider and contemplate during my break. Which with weeks like this…
lol
The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Someone who had a meeting with Chinese Boss called and said they would be late (thinking their appointment was at 3). Chinese Boss tells them their appointment was at 2 and they are already 25 minutes late. Candidate informs Chinese Boss that Muse told her the meeting was at 3. Chinese Boss tells her to come when she can, then immediately calls Muse. All of this is in Chinese so I have no idea what is said. Chinese Boss goes to talk to White Boss (which is how I find anything out). She tells him the story… candidate called to say she would be late, but she is already late, said her meeting was at 3, called Muse who said the meeting was at 3… she recaps all of it. White Boss says that he doesn’t like starting a professional relationship out like that. Either we believe them, and accept that they thought the meeting was at 3. Or we don’t believe them and assume they are maliciously lying. Here’s the issue… the Candidate… is white. Chinese Candidates, Chinese Boss instantly takes their word. So… essentially… White Boss calling her on her culturally-ingrained Anti-Non-Chinese bullshit triggered something. Chinese Boss starts swearing at her law partner and husband. “I don’t fucking care.” Big (though short burst) argument with yelling and swearing where basically Chinese boss tells him to stay out of the Business Management portion of the business.

If Chinese Boss were my Wife… I would interpret her behavior this week as follows:
She is super stressed about moving to a new office, really feeling like she is Out On Her Own, and is putting a lot of pressure on herself. She is going to be short tempered, have trouble with communication (which will make here even more short tempered) and desperate to exert control over something (anything) she feels she can control. (I get this because this is very similar to my ACTUAL wife).

But… Chinese Boss is NOT my wife. She is my boss. I would never allow my wife to be my boss because I (honestly) don’t think Wife would succeed in a professional environment like this. Because no matter what your stress level as a lawyer? You maintain professionalism and your ability to communicate. Without professionalism and Communication, a lawyer is nothing. My clients love me because I am compassionate, explain things to them, take the time to discuss things with them; and then switch to Professional Mode in court. They appreciate that I am a person with them and an Attorney in court. AND… here’s what I would love to tell my bosses but never would (which is why I decided to leave instead)… if you are so stressed that you can’t (1) disengage periodically; or (2) maintain your professionalism while working.... you need to reassess. I get that owning your own business is hard. My brother does it. Quite successfully. He learned that he can’t just do everything himself. And if he doesn’t have people that he can train or trust working for him; he is basically doing everything himself. So… until you get people you can train or trust, you have to decrease your incoming business while you staff. Because if you are trying to do 100% work and any amount of staffing… either the work or the staffing suffers. So you have to cut back on the work so you can get a good staff. Once you have a good staff that you are comfortable with; you go 100% balls to the wall on the work. Since you have established a sound foundation (staff), the work part is easier and flows better and success comes with less stress.

In other words… this is the exact same shit I’ve been saying and even said at the beginning of the day: Don’t push forward without a stable foundation. But their whole thing is “If we’re not moving forward, we’re not successful.” Ooookay… but if you’re not successful it is because you didn’t spend enough time on fundamentals and foundation.... anyone can wildly push forward like a madman… it takes a wise professional to slow down and do things right.

(BTW: Two Extra fun bits… Chinese Boss wants White Boss to take a case out of China… literally out of China. The Chinese Citizen in China wants to divorce her Chinese Citizen husband. WHY IN THE FUCK IS THIS A CASE WE WOULD TAKE?! So… this creates an argument. Of course. Next up… Chinese Boss’ office keeps shorting out. Each office has no less than 4 dual outlets. So… that is arguably 8 powerstrips attached in one office. A BAD IDEA.... but exactly what Chinese Boss has done. UFDA!)