western 'santa'. valerie keep up or miss out thing. more on dennis. xmas tree xmas music mj. free hats winterfest. more evan news. clint thing security aisle 11. best buy sat. annual xmas dinner. in 2018

clint thing. security aisle 11. best buy sat. annual xmas

oh yeah. so a few times the western ‘santa’ explained to me why he wore orange. so people could see him. he’s all like ‘you should get some stripes on that or something’. He meant my big black coat. yes but one thing about black is that no one can see me. I’ll stand out in different ways but not by color. so that’s the other reason i stopped going to the store i was going to. like yes. i know turn that record over man.
oh so Dennis. the guy who moved out of the apt. by my mom’s. well he’s from costa rica he’s a soccer player and he’s really nice. uh. so he’s going to like finland or switzerland.
oh yeah so before we were going to um decorate the xmas tree someone put the radio on and it was a Michael Jackson song. and my sister’s ‘this isn’t christmas music’ and i’m ‘that’s ok. well w/ me’ as i don’t like xmas music. 1 i don’t want to listen to it all the damn time b some of it’s too happy and uh 3 ‘silent night’ reminds me of rape so........yeah. also i don’t like xmas the real reason being a little over 5 yrs. ago now i was raped 2 days before so. which i don’t tell most people. but the other reason is cause everyone’s so damn nice and happy.
um like i mentioned we got free hats at winterfest. the hats are winter hats. they’re red.
oh so right more evan news. yeah on Mon. Dec. 11th we ran into each other at the store like i mentioned. i see him and i’m thinkin ‘is that who i think it is?’ so we approach and he’s ‘what the fuk are you doing here?’ and i’m ‘omygod’. I purchase my items and we go over to the little park and talk. I tell him about mr. rob and that he reminds me of evan. and uh. god.........well i did most of the talking. I tell him I went to seattle and that I moved. and gave him my #. he asked what i was doing for xmas. oh he’d been in california for some time it was alrite. then we went to by the store. it was really. lovely it was the best 30 mins. i’d had in a long time.
So in a recent previous entry I’d mentioned the clint thing. right so as i’d said clint, was my mentor before um valerie. well somehow he’d found about the rape and he’d told her. and she brought it up about a yr. ago or so. now see. i don’t have a problem w/ her having told her. i mean i don’t like, that he told her but that’s not what i’m upset about. no i’m upset. that he didn’t tell me first. as long as i don’t know, that someone broke my confidentiality......as long as i don’t somehow find out. then it’s not an issue. so now clint i don’t talk we haven’t for awhile. i trust valerie as much as i trust anyone. but the reason that works between us is bc i’ve never told her anything big. yes bc i’m not going to be stupid enough to do that again.

Last updated July 15, 2018