Lets Complicate Things in Book Four: Ichi-no-Tani 2017

“Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that’s creativity.” - Charles Mingus
Charles Mingus was an American jazz double bassist, pianist, composer and bandleader. His compositions retained the hot and soulful feel of hard bop, drawing heavily from black gospel music and blues, while sometimes containing elements of Third Stream, free jazz, and classical music. He once cited Duke Ellington and church as his main influences.

Perhaps my family finds boats so relaxing because we know the next wave is always about to crash. So being on a boat, where you’re safe and ready for almost any wave, gives this freedom. This knowledge that, the waves will come but you don’t have to brace yourself for them. Maybe I’m being overly poetic.

“You have to think of your career the way you look at the ocean, deciding which wave you’re gonna take and which waves you’re not gonna take. Some of the waves are going to be big, some are gonna be small, sometimes the sea is going to be calm. Your career is not going to be one steady march upward to glory.” - Alan Arkin
Alan Arkin is s an American actor, director, screenwriter, musician, and singer with a film career spanning six decades.

Last night, Wife told me she needed to revise her resume. Excellent. Awesome. FINALLY taking an active, meaningful step towards doing something to get out of Wal Mart. Thank Christ, Hallelujah! Of course… nothing is ever simple. Not for us.

Complication The First

As part of her therapy, Wife has been encouraged to at least start to try to consider what she may want to do other than Wal Mart. She has looked up things, done some research (kicking and screaming the whole way) and discovered that she may want to do Lab Tech stuff. (Those who have been with me awhile know this isn’t the first time for that). THIS time, however, her Therapist said… “Okay. Now call a place that hires Lab Techs. Ask them what kind of training they look for in a hire. Ask them if you have to have a science background immediately or if that is something you can gain on the job.”

It took Wife two weeks to make that call. I don’t blame her trepidation or concern or her slowness. That which is most frightening often takes the longest for us to tackle. But she finally did it yesterday. She called a Lab Tech hiring place. And they told her that with her background, she could get a Lab Assistant Job and grow into Lab Tech work. And a Lab Assistant job pays $13 w/Benefits. At Wal Mart, after 15 Years, she is getting $13.95 w/Benefits. So… not as significant a fall as she was worried about. AND a job she could do with her current training. THEY asked to see her resume.

So…

COMPLICATION THE FIRST

What if they like her? Like… what if this place wants to hire her? That would be excellent. That would be awesome. That would be fantastic. But… tThat would mean that I 100% absolutely could not accept taking a job away from here. Considering I have an interview I kind of want to nail at a location 183 miles away; that could become an issue.

Complication The Second

Wife hasn’t updated her resume since Omaha. So, the last time I looked the Resume over… I was not an attorney. I wasn’t even a lawyer yet. Now that I am… this whole thing is more complicated.

She wants my assistance on her resume. She brings it up, types in the locations of her most recent stores and voila… a resume covering her career since 2000.

I showed her my resume. AND TOLD HER that an Attorney resume is different from a regular resume because there are specific assumptions that are made when applying for an attorney job! Namely… I don’t have to lead with my education. If I am a licensed attorney, I’ve gone through High School, College, and Law School. Also, when I explain my past work experience “Manned a desk” isn’t sufficient. I have to describe the types of cases, law, and interactions I’ve had. This is an industry that has conflict checks so if I represented Monsanto in a lawsuit against the Government… other law firms are going to need to know that. I tried to explain it to her. It resulted in a fight. Because… I’m trying to tell her how I’m not going to be The Expert to help her, she is stressed because the process is all too much for her. Swallowing my “she’s 37 and should be an adult” chip on my shoulder, I explained to her that perhaps… she should look online for sample resumes. Something that she could use or inspire her. I know that, as an attorney, I have different daily experiences… but “look for a sample online” is the absolute most BASIC first step for “How do I write this?” I then also suggested some of our friends that could help her. Still… due to her emotional state… she tabled the whole thing for the evening. “I’ll do it tomorrow” she said. I just… hope she DOES do it and hope she allows herself to be professional and deliberate about it.

Complication The Third

I just keep getting conflicted because it is in my nature. Like… I had great examples this morning of why I don’t want to work for these people anymore. (1) I get an e-mail forwarded to me by Chinese Boss because it is a criminal matter that needs to be taken care of. The e-mail is entirely in Chinese. Like not pingyang or something… this “有停够时间”. How am I supposed to read that?! BUT… because I’m a good employee, I had Google translate most of it and my expertise in Criminal Law took care of the rest. I had already worked an hour on that case before she got into the office and I had already discovered the answer to almost all of the questions that were sent to me in Chinese. (2) More arguing between Chinese Boss and White Boss where you can tell they don’t have much respect for each other. If you don’t respect the person that you’ve married… if you don’t respect the person that you’ve built a business with… you aren’t going to respect the people who work for you.

This particular issue is on extreme bright light display as I hear another attorney speaking with his new associate. I’ve never heard someone rock the Mentorship thing so well. He’s literally saying things like, “If I got in trouble, I’d want you representing me.” and “Being nervous is standard, but don’t think a judge is going to be especially mean to you because you are on defense. This judge is kind hearted and wants to make sure his court room works.” And he even ended the conversation by saying “Good luck, have fun, and remember… in a few years, you’ll be in my position having this conversation with someone else. It’s all part of being new.” DUDE! That’s… encouraging! Warm, complimentary even. Shit, son.
…

So… that is the Complicated Life element.
Wife might get a job here; requiring me to stay in the DM Metro. Staying in the DM Metro may require I stay with my current firm until they fire me or I quit.
I might nail my interview in Davenport. I might have an opportunity to move to the city I was born in. But how does that impact Wife’s new job enthusiasm? How will that affect other elements?

Bah. It is what it is. I’m probably making more of it than I need to. Either I stay at this firm or I quit. Either I stay at this firm or they fire me. Either I get another job or I don’t. Either Wife gets another job or she doesn’t. Now, while it is not as simple as that (never underestimate emotions and happiness), it can be… until it happens. I don’t have to worry about how potentially unhappy I am/could become at this firm. I don’t have to worry about what happens if I get another job. I don’t have to worry about how soul-crushingly miserable Wife would be if she didn’t get another job. For the moment… life is merely possibilities. Waves at sea while I’m on the beach. I know I’m going to have to swim out to some of those waves but for now? I’m just watching the surf.