Low Man on the Totem Pole in Book Four: Ichi-no-Tani 2017

I get it. I’m an associate. You have to walk before you can run and all that. But sometimes this Low Man, Different Rules for Associate and Partners thing is a real big pain in my ass.

So… My plane landed at Midnight last night. Baggage got on the carousel around 12:45. Got back to my car around 12:55. Got to the apartment at 1:15. Unpacked and ready for bed around 2, 2:14. Chinese Boss wants me at her house at 8 am to discuss cases. After I had already told them I would be at the office between 8 and 9. Maybe that is where things got confused. BEcause I meant I would arrive in the office sometime between the hours of 8:00 and 9:00. I have a Required CLE that starts at noon. Since I was accepted (30 people in all of Iowa get to go), I have repeatedly told my partners that the CLE started at Noon. They both believed it started at 9. Now, if I had made a scheduling error like that, I would be in trouble. But… likely… the partners still consider it to be my error. Ugh.

So, I wake up… skip the shower because of course I have to… and am on the road by 7:15. To a parking lot of a highway. Seriously. It took 36 minutes to go 4 miles. So I’m in the office at 8:05. Chinese Boss is texting and calling asking where am I. I tell her and she says I still need to come to her house. I race to her house (blowing 2 stop lights) and… we talk for five minutes. And I beat her back to the office by a good 20 minutes. And she walks in and I’m still in the office. We could have talked IN THE OFFICE had she decided to come in a little earlier. Instead of me… with maybe 4 hours of sleep… racing around town.

Then… when she does get to the office, she decides to tell me about the “obvious” thing I didn’t do. So… I write a letter, get it approved, save the copy, print a copy, sign it, and send it. Seems… obvious? But it is wrong. Apparently, I am supposed to write a letter, get it approved, save the copy, print a copy, sign it, scan the signed document, save the scan in the same folder the original was saved in, then send the signed physical copy. And that is obvious. But I didn’t do those extra steps; so Chinese Boss is now pretty sure I’m incapable of intelligently sending mail. She called me into her office and asked “Where did you get the address for this company?” Let me explain that, I guess. A client of ours decided not to pay rent. At all. Ever. So now she owes MANY thousands of dollars. Chinese Boss takes the case. The. Fuck? There is no legal remedy for “I decided not to pay rent ever.” But, Chinese Boss takes the case and dumps it on me. So, I look at the Collections Demand letter. There is a PO Box on the “Remit payment to” part of the letter… there is a website on the bottom of the letter that says “If you would like to pay online go to....” and there is a Corporate Office Address. I SENT IT TO THE CORPORATE OFFICE ADDRESS. Chinese Boss wants to know why I decided to send it there. Because it might be wrong. I decided not to belittle her because I’m not inherently a mean person. The letter specifically says, “If you would like evidence or would like to question this statement, please respond within 30 days.” Well… the letter lists the address to send requests for evidence… my letter to them was a request for evidence… I think this is pretty fucking reasonable! But nope. She excused me and said she would do her own research to see where I should have sent the letter. Are you fucking kidding me?! Either train me or respect me; but this “You didn’t know something so now I don’t offer you respect” is bullshit.

No wonder I had a dream last night where I was contemplating quitting. It would be AWFUL for my resume… and allegedly, theoretically, this job really could be good for me. But Christ on a Cracker… Chinese Boss doesn’t, apparently, know the law? Which is concerning.