Rough in Book Four: Ichi-no-Tani 2017

Last night before leaving Work to do The Event; I e-mailed my Wife. We see each other so briefly these days and whenever we do, I’m tired and she’s surly. So I e-mailed her.
I don’t know if/when you’ll read this but… something is wrong and we need to talk about it. Both of us hate our lives. Both of us, within the last 7 days, have mentioned that things might be easier on the other side of death. Neither of us is anywhere close to happy. We both hate what we do for a living and neither of us has the energy or opportunity to fix that. This emotional downward slide also translates to neither of us really enjoying anything in life. We don’t enjoy each other; spending more time either existing, fighting, or annoying one another. We don’t enjoy any activities. We don’t exuberantly bound into hobbies, or sports, or past times. I don’t have any answers. I don’t know what to do. But I know I need to call it out when I see it. We’re both miserable. And that’s no way to live.

Then I went to The Event. Hopefully, fingers crossed, I strummed up business. Because as much of a pain in the ass as it is to do 10 to 13 hour days? It would be infinitely more tolerable if I had paying clients that were (a) giving me work to fill the time; and (b) unwittingly contributing to my potential for ACTUALLY receiving some real money in the future. The event was, I would say, a success. I spoke with many students from many countries (China, Japan, India, Switzerland, Germany, South Korea, Iran, Iraq, Nigeria). I spoke with several new faculty members. So, all in all, I did the best I could to strum up business. We’ll see if it translates into money.

I didn’t get back on the road to go home until 7:30. Considering the drive, I arrived home around 8:30. Of course… a better man would have cooked dinner or gone for a run or started a load of laundry. I, however, had been awake for 14 hours (of which) I had driven about 4 hours and worked about 10. I was very tired and just kind of… fought falling asleep.

At about 10:30, Wife came home… furious. Of course. Work sucked. Work isn’t scheduling properly. And all the drivers on the way home were distracted, drunken amateurs making the world a more dangerous place. Le Sigh. I was too tired to get emotionally involved in her whirlwind. But I did offer that, since it was the first full day of the Iowa State Fair, that could account for the drivers. I was exhausted. Wife sits down and eats a sandwich. I don’t interact much because (again) tired. At this point I’d been awake for 17 hours. Wife angrily says, “I thought you said you wanted to talk.” ::exasperated sigh:: OMG woman. I respond with, “I don’t know what to say and I’m really tired. But we’re miserable. We hate everything about our lives. We need to figure that out.” Then I went to bed. And could not sleep. That “so tired I can’t sleep” place of tired. Wife comes to bed around 12:30 and I’m just starting to get to sleep. SO, I wake up a little at the new individual in the room. Doze back off in about 20 minutes. Until 5, 6, and 7. Each time when Wife wakes me up violently because I was snoring. Not that my snoring woke her up. It is that she woke up but my snoring was keeping her from going back to sleep. So I needed to wake up so that she could get back to sleep. Y’know… despite the fact that my job starts between 7 and 9 am and her shift for today starts at 1 p.m.

Despite my better judgment and certainly against what Wife would want me to do… I may just buy some whiskey tonight on my way home; play video games and provide a little self-love; and set up the guest room so I can sleep without being interrupted.

I get in to work and have to take two trips up to the office so that I can make sure to grab everything we used for the event. White Boss is present but tells me that he is leaving today at 10 a.m. since his mom is coming for a visit. I need to contact a Police Officer 115 miles away so we can get him served. Find out that the guy must be (a) served personally and (b) only works the night shift. So… that may be work that happens at like midnight or later today. Plus, White Boss and Chinese Boss are both running around like Chickens without Heads. Apparently they are super duper extremely mondo busy! Meanwhile… the associate over here… (me)… has 2 clients of my own. My own meaning: not equally shared with the other attorneys. SO… yeah. I’ve got oodles of time. If they are unable or unwilling to let me know if/when/how I can provide assistance… I’ll have to make it a specific part of my weekly reports. Just open the report with “AND MORE WORK WOULD BE GREAT, THANKS!”

So, I have really nothing at all to do today other than prepare for the speech tomorrow that eats up/kills my Saturday. I would start asking for more work right now but… White Boss is gone for the day and Chinese Boss (while likely not gone for the day) went with her husband to pick up her Mother In Law from the airport. Though… frankly, if she IS gone for the day? Good. While I may be required to remain present in this office from 8 until late; if White Boss and Chinese boss are gone for the day… I will leave when everyone else in this building does! Because every Friday, everyone leaves around 4 or 4:30. Except White Boss, Chinese Boss, and me. Who remain, typically, until 6. So… if Chinese Boss doesn’t return. I can leave at 5!! Ha. Imagine that, a workday that only lasts 9 hours. Straaaaaaange.

Oh… speaking of that topic (and the now vast amount of time I have) I was looking up employment laws today. The United States and the state of Iowa sucks. At Will (meaning anyone can be fired for any time with no rights of appeal) employment is the standard. State Governor unilaterally signed into law a bill that requires Minimum Wage expectations to be the same throughout the state. He did this because wealthier areas were trying to increase their local Minimum Wage due to Cost of Living concerns. So that (for example) a McDonald’s Employee working in a store where Cost of Living is like West Des Moines might afford to live in a 1 bedroom studio apartment if he has 2 room mates. But a McDonald’s Employee working in a store where Cost of Living is like Pocahontas, that person can probably afford a house! So changing Minimum Wage based on that metric made sense to local government officials and was resoundingly halted. But the two really fucked up things? BY LAW?
(1) No business, corporation, or company is required to offer, make available, or provide Bathroom Breaks or Bathroom facilities to employees.
(2) No company in the United States is required to offer any paid time off of any kind.

Maybe I’m confusing my history but wasn’t the Ludlow Massacre supposed to call this shit out? Like… in the United States of America, people were literally killed because they were demanding such unreasonable things as “an 8 hour work day” and “weekends” or “holidays” and that kind of thing. Again, I may be wrong but… it just feels like, over the last few decades, everything men like Bartoloti, Valdez, and Petrucci died for has gone away again. Perhaps this is minimizing too much but… I am starting to think the conflict between the Super Haves, the Mostly Haves, the Have Nots, and the Super Have Nots is the worst and most destructive conflict in the world.

Well, Chinese Boss came back over the lunch hour to “encourage me to do one or two things” and then left for the rest of the day. So… that’s where I am. I’m going to do a few things for the office; make a phone call or two; and go home.