CS is filed in Since OD is shutting down....

My Mom went with me yesterday and I got it done. I know that I will probably never receive any money from him but in my state, you have to file to keep your child on Medicaid, food stamps and child care assistance. I know the first time they take money out of his check, he’ll quit working so the next thing is he’ll be looking at jail time. I do hope that he gets a job and pays it because it would be nice to get some financial help with her but he’s a very selfish, immature person so it’s probably not going to happen.

He kept telling my friend the other day that he wasn’t going to sign the PA unless he saw her but he saw her at the hospital and still didn’t sign. It’s like he just wants things to be as unfair as possible to me and our child but as fair to him as he wants it. He doesn’t really want to be a Dad in the sense of being financially responsible but wants to see her whenever it works for him and make decisions for her.

This guy just sees shit the way he wants to see shit even if it’s wrong and makes no sense at all. I’m not going to have him around due to the RO and because I just don’t trust him. I completely understand that a child should know their Dad but every situation is different and until he gets the mental help that he needs, gets himself stable, and learns to stop threatening me and saying mean things, I don’t plan for him to see her. It’s just not going to happen. I’m the Mom and want to make the best decisions for my daughter and that includes keeping her safe.

My parents were here yesterday talking about how they needed money to make their motorcycle payment. I’m definitely not going to help with that because anytime you give them money, you NEVER get it back and I just can’t afford to give out huge lumps of money. I still don’t know what’s going on with my Mom getting her job back but they called her references 3 days ago and never called her to say when they’d like her to return so I think she should probably start finding different employment. I’m getting really sick of my Mom being between jobs.

My back has been hurting me the past couple of days and I’m getting really tired of it. I still have painkillers from my C-section that I could be taking but they make me really drowsy so I don’t take them anymore. The baby slept pretty good last night so I got more sleep than I usually do but I’m still planning a nap later. It’s going to be super hot again today and I’m gonna be glad when it starts getting cooler outside. I don’t mind the heat when I can stay cool indoors but lately it’s been so hot that my AC freezes up so I have to turn it off for awhile and let it sit.

We are in a heat advisory for the weekend and that makes me really annoyed. I don’t want to plan to just sit around dying of the heat for a couple of days. This Summer has been absolutely brutal and I’ll be glad when Fall gets here. I’m gonna go check out a daycare sometime next week because the lady was super nice and offered for me to come over and check it out. The one I originally had lined up is really shitty at communicating and seems like she really doesn’t want to watch my kid because she said they are going to be moving and she’s not going to be open on some Saturdays so I think I need to have something else in the works.

I’d kinda like my Mom to come spend the night again but every time she does, she won’t really interact with the baby, sleeps the whole time, eats all my food, and really isn’t as fun as she used to be. I know that her diabetes isn’t controlled and that has a lot to do with it but I’ve told her to see a Dr and she won’t fucking do it. It’s also frustrating because she eats all my food and then I have to go buy more. Ugh, I just wish my parents could be normal people. I’m glad that they’ve actually been around and have helped me a lot but I just wish I didn’t feel like it always came with strings.

More later.