A Wise Man Once Said: in General Mental Anesthesia

I don’t really listen to the Beatles because I’m just not a fan of insects, but Paul McCartney must be wise because he looks like an owl.

Why are owls wise, because they eat mosquitoes and mice? Or is it because they can turn their heads 180 degrees? Linda Blair can do that, is she wise? There’s an owl on the potato chip bag; is eating chips a good way to become wise? I know it can lower your sex drive, maybe if you use dip, but what kind of dip is the wisest dip? I think it’s French onion, but should you listen to me? Am I wise? I’ve been told I’m a wise ass. Does that count?

Do wise people need to know that Y=MX +B, or how to spell out DNA or why someone decided that 26 letters was enough for the alphabet, just think how many new words we could use if we had more letters. That guy doesn’t sound very wise to me, Can wise people count to infinity? How do you come up with a finite symbol for something that goes on forever? And if you can’t see forever how do you know it’s there? What is it? Do we exist and live based on a foundation of lies? Who invented the lie and why? That guy’s an asshole!

Why is green not pink and why does the sky turn blue when the sun hits it, but when you mix yellow and black you get more black? Wise is nothing. Nothing and no one. A wise person is everyone, someone, anyone and no one; actually, most people are complete morons.

I don’t claim to be wise, though perhaps am above average at witticism and a solid performer of wisecracks.

Truthfully, people talk too much and don’t listen enough; mouths are bigger than ears while brains are bigger than both and used the least.

“Silent” and “Listen” use exactly the same letters.

Want to be wise? Tell you what, I’ll sell it to you for $10. You’re money will go to a good cause (your education and my health). Now that is wise, paypal accepted, tell your friends.

Last updated April 14, 2020