More thoughts. in Since OD is shutting down....

I’m still thinking about everything with my BD and I’m still very frustrated that neither one of my friends have blocked him and keep engaging in conversation with him. I wish they understood as much as they think they are being neutral or helping, they aren’t. I’m definitely worried that they are going to help influence him to never be a Dad and that’s what concerns me. I do want him to be there for our child, provided he gets help and can get himself in a good place.

I just wish they understood that when I got the protection order, I put a wall up. I should have the decision whether or not my ‘friends’ are talking to him or not considering this isn’t their child or their situation and it really pisses me off that no matter how many times I’ve asked them to block him or just quit answering him, they won’t. I get that drama is fun but it’s my child that could potentially suffer for other people’s stupidity and need to be fueled by this crap.

My main friend continues to deal with him simply because she’s very argumentative and enjoys the debate. She’s very good at defending me and making him feel like a piece of shit but everything said to him could affect my child in a negative way.

All I know is once the baby is born, I’m going to make sure they know I don’t want to receive any more screenshots or even talk about him for awhile considering I’m going to be recovering from birth and bonding with my child. The drama will have to cease until I’m ready to try and figure something out with him. I want to sit and just blame them for continuing to fight with him but I also keep in mind that if he wouldn’t have been so crazy, there wouldn’t be a RO and we could talk to each other directly. He’s fucked this situation up so badly and there’s still no headway being made for us to attempt contact.

I know that the drama is never going to end because they won’t just block him and let it be but I’m going to set down some limitations too. Once I have her, I want to just be able to focus on healing and bonding with her. I’m not going to care about him and his bullshit for awhile. If he thinks that this shit is going to be tolerated while I’m sore and taking care of her by myself, I’ll just end up going ghost on everyone. I don’t have to have contact with any of these fucking people and I won’t if it comes down to it. I’ve had more than enough drama in my life for months now and it’s going to stop one way or another. Either everyone just fucking leaves it alone or I’ll deactivate Facebook and change my fucking number.